Any good jokes ... ?

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NCE7XV

Regular
Location
NV
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houblon

Senior Member
Wasnt trump's white house the first in a hundred years not to home a dog? (Think I might have set one up there...)
 

CharlesF

Guru
Location
Glasgow
Little Mary was not the best student in Sunday School. Usually she slept through the class. One day the teacher called on her while she was napping, ”Tell me, Mary, who created the universe?”

When Mary didn’t stir, little Johnny, an altruistic boy seated in the chair behind her, took a pin and jabbed her in the rear. ”God Almighty !” shouted Mary and the teacher said, ”Very good” and Mary fell back to sleep.

A while later the teacher asked Mary, ”Who is our Lord and Savior?” But Mary didn’t even stir from her slumber. Once again, Johnny came to the rescue and stuck her again. ”Jesus Christ!” shouted Mary and the teacher said, ”Very good,” and Mary fell back to sleep.

Then the teacher asked Mary a third question, ”What did Eve say to Adam after she had her twenty-third child?” And again, Johnny jabbed her with the pin. This time Mary jumped up and shouted, ”If you stick that damn thing in me one more time, I’ll break it in half!”
 

NCE7XV

Regular
Location
NV
A man stranded on a desert island sees a boat wash up on the shore with a woman inside. The woman asks the man - How long have you been here?

A long time.

How long has it been since you had a cigar?

A long time.

She reaches down and gives him a box of Cuba's finest. How long has it been since you had a beer?

A long time.

She reaches down and gives him a bottle of ice cold beer. She looks at him coyly and asks - How long has it been since you played around?

You've got golf clubs on that boat?
 
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