Any good jokes ... ?

[Sharky]

How many seconds are there in one year?

Spoiler: Answer

12
2nd Jan, 2nd Feb, 2nd march .... etc

 

[ebikeerwidnes]

How many seconds are there in one year?

Spoiler: Answer

12
2nd Jan, 2nd Feb, 2nd march .... etc

leap year or not?

and is there a leap second in the year in question?

and that is a calendar year - are you talking about a solar year - as in the actual amount of time it takes to traverse the relevant distance??

or am I being pedantic??

 

[ebikeerwidnes]

leap year or not?

and is there a leap second in the year in question?

and that is a calendar year - are you talking about a solar year - as in the actual amount of time it takes to traverse the relevant distance??

or am I being pedantic??

Just looked at the spoiler

possibly should have done that first???

 

[Vapin' Joe]

 

[ebikeerwidnes]

View attachment 805822

When I was a teacher we had some kids that worked that one out!!

The senior management decided to install CCTV over the whole school - which took a while but was worth doing anyway

But by then we (The teachers) had sorted it.
Basically some Year 11 boys and girls were approaching their GCSE exams and were getting a bit concerned about missing revision lessons

they suggested to "some of the teachers" that they might take matters into their own hands

but we pointed out that violence was never a solution and if they got suspended then that would mess their exams up even more



funnily enough the problem stopped soon after that - I am sure no violence was involved but one has to suspect that a year 11 boy looming might have been involved in some ways - probably outside school

 

[swee'pea99]

When I was a teacher we had some kids that worked that one out!!

The senior management decided to install CCTV over the whole school - which took a while but was worth doing anyway

But by then we (The teachers) had sorted it.
Basically some Year 11 boys and girls were approaching their GCSE exams and were getting a bit concerned about missing revision lessons

they suggested to "some of the teachers" that they might take matters into their own hands

but we pointed out that violence was never a solution and if they got suspended then that would mess their exams up even more



funnily enough the problem stopped soon after that - I am sure no violence was involved but one has to suspect that a year 11 boy looming might have been involved in some ways - probably outside school

My school was a bit lawless, and fire alarms were pretty much a weekly occurrence. Imagine our surprise one day at getting down to the playground to discover that the school was actually on fire!

 

[Gwylan]

Do you need a current licence to drive an electric car? 🤔

Some people need inductance to ride them

 

[Dave7]

Newly married couple go to the bedroom.
As he took off his socks she asked what happened to his feet. He said "as a child I caught tolio". She said "you mean polio". He said "no, it only affected my toes".
As he took off his trousers she asked "what's wrong with your legs"? He said "as a child I caught kneesles".
When he was naked she looked at him and said "dont tell me, as a child you caught smallcox".

 

[ebikeerwidnes]

Not sure if it counts as a joke or not but anyway

 

[tyred]

 

[Chislenko]

There is nothing extraordinary about average speed cameras.

 

[Mike Ayling]

leap year or not?

and is there a leap second in the year in question?

and that is a calendar year - are you talking about a solar year - as in the actual amount of time it takes to traverse the relevant distance??

or am I being pedantic??

Yes

 

[postman]

We were so poor in Primary school my clothes came from the Army and Navy store.I was the only Japanese General in school.

 

[tyred]

We were so poor in Primary school my clothes came from the Army and Navy store.I was the only Japanese General in school.

We all wore hand-me-downs. I remember one day my sister wore the same dress as the teacher, and he wasn't too pleased.

 

[Regular.Cyclist]

We were so poor in Primary school my clothes came from the Army and Navy store.I was the only Japanese General in school.

I, genuinely, was the only German tank commander in school 😂.