Salty seadog
Space Cadet...(3rd Class...)
Guy walks into the pub with a slab of asphalt under his arm.
Pint please barkeep, pointing to the slab and one for the road
Pint please barkeep, pointing to the slab and one for the road
Any good jokes ... ?
- Thread starter cisamcgu
- Start date
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<breathes sigh of relief it wasn't the bloody cyclepath/psychopath one>
A man walks into a bar in Manchester with a roll of blue tarmac under his arm, blah, blah, blah, something about Londoners.
Joey Shabadoo
My pronouns are "He", "Him" and "buggerlugs"
A cowboy walks into a bar and orders a drink. When the bartender delivers it, the cowboy looks around and notices the bar is completely deserted.
"Where is everybody? This place is usually packed this time of day," the cowboy says.
The bartender replies, "They've gone to the hanging."
"Hanging? Who are they hanging?"
"Brown Paper Pete," says the bartender.
"What kind of name is that? Why do they call him Brown Paper Pete?" the cowboy asks.
"Well," says the bartender, "he wears a brown paper hat, brown paper shirt, brown paper trousers and brown paper shoes."
"Weird guy," says the cowboy. "What are they hanging him for?"
"Rustling," says the bartender.
"Where is everybody? This place is usually packed this time of day," the cowboy says.
The bartender replies, "They've gone to the hanging."
"Hanging? Who are they hanging?"
"Brown Paper Pete," says the bartender.
"What kind of name is that? Why do they call him Brown Paper Pete?" the cowboy asks.
"Well," says the bartender, "he wears a brown paper hat, brown paper shirt, brown paper trousers and brown paper shoes."
"Weird guy," says the cowboy. "What are they hanging him for?"
"Rustling," says the bartender.
AndyRM
XOXO
- Location
- North Shields
AndyRM
XOXO
- Location
- North Shields
Maverick Goose
A jumped up pantry boy, who never knew his place
- Location
- A champagne supernova in the sky
A couple of bag slogans spotted in Booths today:
Eat Barm And Carry On
The Pie Who Loved Me
Eat Barm And Carry On
The Pie Who Loved Me
Profpointy
Legendary Member
Related to the above: sign in the window of an outdoor gear shop
"now is the discount of our winter tents"
"now is the discount of our winter tents"
The one in Warrington said "now is the winter of our discount tents".
Profpointy
Legendary Member
I dithered over which order
I didnt get where I am today by dithering
swee'pea99
Legendary Member
Best ever, on the side of a van I used to see when I was growing up: "Patel double glazing - you've tried the cowboys, now try the Indians."
flake99please
We all scream for ice cream
- Location
- Edinburgh
A Glaswegian lad takes his girlfriend home for the first time.
Son says ‘This is Amanda’.
His dad jumps up and shouts ‘It’s a fricken what’?
Son says ‘This is Amanda’.
His dad jumps up and shouts ‘It’s a fricken what’?
