Any good jokes ... ?

[tyred]

 

[Dave7]

It was my birthday yesterday and I bought a tin of creosote as I decided to treat myself.

 

[Regular.Cyclist]

While my wife was in the kitchen cooking breakfast I suddenly heard a loud thud. Running in I found her collapsed on the floor & not breathing. I was in a blind frenzy, I had no idea what to do.

Then I remembered,

Wetherspoons do an all day breakfast for just £6.09.

 

[Sharky]

There was a break in at Microsoft, during office hours and none of the staff even noticed ...

They were so very used to the sound of windows crashing.

 

[tyred]

 

[lenfield]

 

[Vapin' Joe]

Isn't it funny how you can spend the whole night trying to find a comfortable position to get to sleep, yet when it's time to get up you can sleep in any position.

 

[Vapin' Joe]

If you type Gary Oldman into google, don 't forget the "R"

 

[Profpointy]

If you type Gary Oldman into google, don 't forget the "R"

There's a well regarded business and technology consultancy Gartner. Our secretary got very confused looking for some report when she missed out the "n". True story

 

[Regular.Cyclist]

A secretary where I worked many years ago was filling away the previous days paperwork and spotted something that made her a panicked call to the HR director’s PA to ask her to intercept a letter. The director’s name was a Mr A. White. Unfortunately W and S are quite close to each other on a QWERTY keyboard.

 

[kynikos]

A secretary where I worked many years ago was filling away the previous days paperwork and spotted something that made her a panicked call to the HR director’s PA to ask her to intercept a letter. The director’s name was a Mr A. White. Unfortunately W and S are quite close to each other on a QWERTY keyboard.

In a similar vein so are M & N. Mr Condon was not happy when he received his new cheque book shortly after opening his new account at the bank where I was working at the time...

 

[Arjimlad]

I spent two years writing to solicitors for the National Westmonster Bank before anyone noticed the typo in the letter heading.

 

[Toshiba Boy]

We had a client in the early 1980's, who was called Victor David Thomas.

For some reason, can't think why, he was the only client always referred to in our office by both his initials and his surname....

 

[Sharky]

Reminds me ....

Went to a school that used Roman numerals to name each stream in each year.

So in the 5th year we had ...
VA(five A etc), VB and VC classes.

But when there was a large intake of pupils, needing four streams, we had .....
VA, VB, VC1 and VC2 classes - our very traditional head master wouldn't have VD at the school.

 

[raleighnut]

We had a client in the early 1980's, who was called Victor David Thomas.

For some reason, can't think why, he was the only client always referred to in our office by both his initials and his surname....

I used to work with a guy called John Thomas