Any tips for leaving work matters behind?

[fossyant]

Been there twice with the last two jobs.

It's a vicious circle as jobs are few and far between at the moment. I would advise not doing overtime, and stick to contracted hours, and try not to do everything - see if you can off load some things. You'll just end up stressed, then ill, then off work.

My last two jobs both became like you were saying, loads of pressure, loads of work, long commutes and long hours. I changed jobs couple of years ago, and at times it gets stressful etc, then I just think, "bollox the work will still be there in the morning" - I'm off home. No point busting your own ass when folk round you aren't - you just get nowhere.

In previous jobs, I'd get called whilst on holiday, about all sorts of pathetic stuff. Despite now having a works blackberry, I switch it on at 8.30am, and off at 5.00pm. Simples...MY time is MY time...got too much stuff going on outside work ta..... Too many staff email via there phones at 11pm...WTF.....

Take it easy fella.

 

[Arch]

I know some people who lie awake worrying if they have insomnia. Don't lose sleep worrying about sleeplessness. It seems frivolous but it isn't. If you wake up, read a book. Stay in bed and relax but don't just lie there, in the dark, worrying about shoot which isn't worth worrying about. Relaxing in bed is still giving your body recovery time, find a crap book to empty your mind as well.

I went through a phase of having trouble sleeping, some years back, sometimes having trouble getting to sleep, sometimes waking up and then not getting back to sleep, worriting over personal problems. I ended up having the radio on - R4, which becomes World Service overnight. Very quiet, but audible enough to make out the speech. Concentrating on (or actually, not really concentrating, but just hearing) the words drove the other stuff out of my head.

Sometimes, of course, you run the risk of being woken by some especially exhuberant world music, but I generally get off to sleep again. I realise this may disturb any sleeping partner, but it's a suggestion. If I'm away, and don't have my bedside clock radio, I use a little travel radio with an earphone (and haven't strangled myself in my sleep yet).

 

[Armegatron]

How do you get home from work mate?

Never really been like this myself as you might have guessed I don't take very much seriously, but a mate swears by this who was getting really stressed.

Told everyone in his work he wouldn't take any calls on his mobile after 6.30 so set a ground rule with them
He drives home every night and arrives between 6.30 and 7
Sits in the driveway and switches off the radio and phone
Sits for 10 mins thinking about the day
Reviews in his head what he did well, what he could do better, any issues with anything else, writes them down and then leaves the pad in the car with his work phone.
Goes into the house, see's his wife and kids and he's a lot more relaxed

His wife swears he's a changed man since he started doing it and he has slept well since and hence her, as he's not tossing and turning all night, she's happier and not tired, he's happier and not tired, they enjoy their evening more and they have more rumpy pumpy. Everyones a winner!

Im going to have to try this next week - sounds fantastic!
Thanks

 

[Norm]

I ended up having the radio on - R4, which becomes World Service overnight. Very quiet, but audible enough to make out the speech. Concentrating on (or actually, not really concentrating, but just hearing) the words drove the other stuff out of my head.

+1, which reminds me of another technique which I still use and that's to set a "bedtime" playlist on my ipod. Not just the stereotypical whale-song but a selection of the quieter tracks. Listening to them without having to listen to them also helps clear my mind.

 

[longers]

Thanks for starting this thread Panter, shame you had to but I've read some great advice here.

 

[Shaun]

Yes, some good advice, and I would just add that no job is ever worth your health.

Cheers,
Shaun

 

[biggs682]

did the same as many others gave up a high pressure job and took a less stressful one and still doing it 5 yrs later and can ride back and forth including lunches so do the same

 

[ttcycle]

Forgot to also say - Basically get active in your mind - it's ok to been down/stressed - give yourself a bit of time to have an argh moment - usually good done with good people you trust- let off the steam and if urgent things need to be done (ie firefighting for YOUR sanity not tasks for the sake of work getting done) do them, and think of ways and tasks to sort out the situation for you- anything else you can't do simply cause you're not at work hence pointless fretting about them..and if you find yourself thinking of stuff that needs doing or situations that need sorting that can't be sorted now - you're under too much stress and your worklife balance is erring on the wrong side of work not life.

Take it easy.

 

[sheddy]

At the risk of sounding facetious, if I wake up before 5pm I pop down for some cereal and milk. Usually asleep within 30mins
I only found this out when work stress had me awake week nights

 

[bobg]

You have my sympathy, I worry about EVERYTHING. AS mentioned earlier, that idea of jotting down all the things that are concerning you in a notebook just before you leave work was a big success for me. It made me feel as if I'd downloaded all my problem and left them somewhere else
Whatever you try I really hope you find some relief from it

 

[cyberknight]

I feel for you,currently considering seeing the doctor for stress as 2 years of work related worry have left me very easily annoyed and it is affecting my family to such an extent that my wife told me to get help or she would leave ( that did not help either )

Would like another job but with the economic climate there is zilch about paying near what i need to survive, and i am not earning that either as for the last 18 months been £400 a month short in take home so on the edge of declaring bankruptcy.

 

[beanzontoast]

I went through a phase of having trouble sleeping, some years back, sometimes having trouble getting to sleep, sometimes waking up and then not getting back to sleep, worriting over personal problems. I ended up having the radio on - R4, which becomes World Service overnight. Very quiet, but audible enough to make out the speech. Concentrating on (or actually, not really concentrating, but just hearing) the words drove the other stuff out of my head.

Sometimes, of course, you run the risk of being woken by some especially exhuberant world music, but I generally get off to sleep again. I realise this may disturb any sleeping partner, but it's a suggestion. If I'm away, and don't have my bedside clock radio, I use a little travel radio with an earphone (and haven't strangled myself in my sleep yet).

This is exactly what I do when work things keep me awake - I have a little radio with earphones so that I don't disturb Mrs B. There are a number of other talk programmes on during the night - phone-ins etc - besides World Service. Sometimes I listen in for a few minutes, then take the earpiece out and let it lie nearby on the pillow, as I find it uncomfortable to go to sleep with the earpiece still in place. You can hear the speech, but not what's being said, and it acts as just enough of a distraction to help me nod back off to sleep.

+1 with the pad by the bed too. It helps to stop you thinking about things that you need to remember for the morning. Write it, then forget about it. I generally leave my watch on the notepad at bedtime so I know I will remember to look at the scribbles on the pad in the morning.

 

[Panter]

Many thanks all, I really appreciate all the time taken.

There's loads of good stuff there, I'm going to quiety work through and put a plan together.
Some things I used to do, but I'd forgotten about, and they've slipped by the wayside.

Please don't read me wrong, the job isn't that bad and most of the time I sleep Ok and can generally switch off when at home.
It's just when things get difficult, like now, I find it very hard to shut down and I don't like the feeling of something else controlling me, if that makes sense (sorry, I'm tired )

Quitting isn't really an option, although if it ever gets to the stage where its getting too much, then I'll drop it in a heartbeat.
I always used to be adamant that NOTHING was more important than your (and your families) health so it's nice to be reminded of that.

Thanks again all,

 

[Greedo]

Many thanks all, I really appreciate all the time taken.

There's loads of good stuff there, I'm going to quiety work through and put a plan together.
Some things I used to do, but I'd forgotten about, and they've slipped by the wayside.

Please don't read me wrong, the job isn't that bad and most of the time I sleep Ok and can generally switch off when at home.
It's just when things get difficult, like now, I find it very hard to shut down and I don't like the feeling of something else controlling me, if that makes sense (sorry, I'm tired )

Quitting isn't really an option, although if it ever gets to the stage where its getting too much, then I'll drop it in a heartbeat.
I always used to be adamant that NOTHING was more important than your (and your families) health so it's nice to be reminded of that.

Thanks again all,

Keep your chin up mate!

The thing I said also worked for a few other people I know. It's amazing what 10 - 15 mins quite contemplation can do at the end of the day when you've finished your commute home. Don't do it in the office, wait till you get home.

Failing that despite others saying no, I'd get pished only kidding. drink is never the answer. NEVER I'LL TELL YOU

Oh and have you ever tried taking that scarf off your face. You might breathe easier!

 

[Panter]

Keep your chin up mate!

The thing I said also worked for a few other people I know. It's amazing what 10 - 15 mins quite contemplation can do at the end of the day when you've finished your commute home. Don't do it in the office, wait till you get home.

Failing that despite others saying no, I'd get pished only kidding. drink is never the answer. NEVER I'LL TELL YOU

Oh and have you ever tried taking that scarf off your face. You might breathe easier!

Bugger, I knew it would be something straightforward