Baby sitting.

[gavroche]

My wife's daughter, who lives in Devon, asked us if we could baby sit for her next week end. She lives 330 miles away so that would be a 660 miles journey on M6 and M5 . I said "No" due to distance involved for just a few days. Her husband offered to pay for the fuel but I still refused on the ground that if we do it this time, they will take it for granted next time. My wife, on the other hand, has said she will do it so it will be a train journey for her as I stick to my guns. I expect the "do gooders" on this site to turn against me now with excuses like: family comes first, relationships etc.... Fire away.

 

[AndyRM]

"Do gooders"?

If nothing else, it might be nice to support your wife by giving her a lift. You don't have to do any babysitting.

 

[Flyboy]

I am with you here , that is way too far. I can understand your wife , but you do have to be realistic . Saying that my wife would say yes and exspect me to take her, as she doesn't drive. I actually wouldn't let her get the train and she knows that . It's a tough one fella .

 

[Drago]

Id jump at the chance to have my grandkids. Time and distance mean little to a retiree, so I'd go it. Maybe pack my bike on the roof of the car as well.

But they're your grandkids, it's your call to make, not mine.

 

[gavroche]

Id jump at the chance to have my grandkids. Time and distance mean little to a retiree, so I'd go it. Maybe pack my bike on the roof of the car as well.

But they're your grandkids, it's your call to make, not mine.

I should mention that they are 14 and 16, so not exactly todlers.

 

[jefmcg]

If she's your wife's daughter, then I guess she's not your step daughter in your mind. I assume you didn't raise her. If so, these are just random kids, and to you it's a chore: babysitting. To your wife, it's spending time with her grandkids, and the most precious kind for the right sort of granny - with no parents to stop you spoiling them.

One of those is worth the round trip, one is not. It sounds like you've come to the solution you need to. I can't imagine what input you need from us.

Edit:

I should mention that they are 14 and 16, so not exactly todlers.

Even more important to spend the time with them, it's not long before they will be out in the world and she may not get this sort of time with them.

Edit 2: If the eldest is already 16, how many "next times" do you have to worry about?

 

[Drago]

Even better, less work for you, more cycling time. But its your call.

 

[summerdays]

My parents live 100 miles away, but each year I used to ask my Mum down to babysit on the night of a big Christmas do. We wouldn't get back until the early hours of the morning. She did it for me and I was very grateful as it would have been hard to get a babysitter for such a long time, plus my Mum then could go to sleep at a normal time and the next day we always had a lovely day together with the kids at that excited run up to Christmas enthusiasm.

I would do the same for my kids, I wouldn't do a weekly babysit over that sort of distance but for those really awkward times I'd like to help if I could. I'm hoping my children will end up settling reasonably locally as I grew up with having to travel to Northern Ireland to visit my grandparents and I was always jealous of my cousins who were local.

 

[gavroche]

My parents live 100 miles away, but each year I used to ask my Mum down to babysit on the night of a big Christmas do. We wouldn't get back until the early hours of the morning. She did it for me and I was very grateful as it would have been hard to get a babysitter for such a long time, plus my Mum then could go to sleep at a normal time and the next day we always had a lovely day together with the kids at that excited run up to Christmas enthusiasm.

I would do the same for my kids, I wouldn't do a weekly babysit over that sort of distance but for those really awkward times I'd like to help if I could. I'm hoping my children will end up settling reasonably locally as I grew up with having to travel to Northern Ireland to visit my grandparents and I was always jealous of my cousins who were local.

If it was just 100 miles away, I wouldn't hesitate and do it but the thought of travelling on the M6 and M5 on a Friday and Monday , stuck in traffic jams and taking a good 7 hours each way puts me off.

 

[swee'pea99]

I actually wouldn't let her get the train

Er, why not?

And as for the OP, have to say my response would be along the lines of 'You have got to be kidding.'

 

[jefmcg]

It sounds like you've come to the solution you need to.

There is one more solution: put the kids on the train to come and stay with you!

 

[Milkfloat]

Just remember, she could be choosing the home you go into in your old age. Either that or she could the be the one to wipe your and/or your wife’s bottom when you are unable.

 

[User482]

My wife's daughter, who lives in Devon, asked us if we could baby sit for her next week end. She lives 330 miles away so that would be a 660 miles journey on M6 and M5 . I said "No" due to distance involved for just a few days. Her husband offered to pay for the fuel but I still refused on the ground that if we do it this time, they will take it for granted next time. My wife, on the other hand, has said she will do it so it will be a train journey for her as I stick to my guns. I expect the "do gooders" on this site to turn against me now with excuses like: family comes first, relationships etc.... Fire away.

You're looking at this all wrong: go and babysit, and you get to use their heat and power for free, and use none in your own home. What could be more appealing?

 

[gavroche]

Ever wonder why they choose to live 330 miles away?

No need to be sarcastic. Her husband is from Devon and his business is in Devon.

 

[pawl]

"Do gooders"?

If nothing else, it might be nice to support your wife by giving her a lift. You don't have to do any babysitting.

To the station?