Simon goes on 'Stars in their eyes'. Matthew Kelly notices he's in a wheelchair. "What happened?" he asks. Simon replies, "I was in a car crash with my uncle, he died and I had my legs amputated, but they saved my uncle's legs and grafted them onto me. In six months time I will be able to walk again." "That's amazing" says Matthew, "Who are you going to be?" Simon says, "Tonight Matthew I'm going to be...
(wait for it)
...Simon & Halfuncle!"
(wait for it)
...Simon & Halfuncle!"