Welcome to D-Day young man, this is the start of war. Hostilities began at zero-hundred hours last night, you should now be in a state of high alert and prepared to defend your team from attack at any time.
The enemy is cunning and strong, devious and subtle, and eats kittens, baby bunny rabbits as well as rare birds of prey. We are pretty sure that the enemy is also responsible for the illigal trade in ivory, alien abductions, rednecks and chavs.
With your allies, you are equipt to fight the enemy. Mrs Fudd is on hand as your scout and bodyguard, and is in control of essential weaponry. We are here as Tactical Net Support, call us in at any time for backup.
Chant after me...
This is my bicycle. There are many like it but this one is mine. My bicycle is my best friend. It is my life. I must master it as I must master my life. Without me, my bicycle is useless. Without my bicycle I am useless. I must ride my bicycle true. I must ride faster than my enemy, who is trying to kill me. I must drop him before he drops me. I will. Before God I swear this creed: my bicycle and myself are defenders of my country, we are the masters of my enemy, we are the saviors of my life. So be it, until there is no enemy, but peace. Amen.