Drago's English language rant #72

[slowmotion]

No, sorry. My company (Delta) is based in Atlanta, and of course all my U.S. colleagues pronounce those as "Delda" and "Atlanna". I pronounce them as "Delta" and "Atlanta", and those colleagues seem to find that really charming and "English". I'd rather keep those differences, and I suspect my colleagues rather enjoy the differences too. (We Josh each other over accents and "football" a lot). I'd hate for us to become one conglomerated, glottal homogenization.

A very long time ago, I had to go through Customs at Miami airport on the way home from a backpacking trip of Mexico. I had a pineapple and I declared it to a female customs officer.

"Sorry, can you say that again?"

"I've got a pineapple."

She called over a couple of her colleagues so they could listen.......

" My God....I just love the way you Brits speak..."

 

[swee'pea99]

A very long time ago, I had to go through Customs at Miami airport on the way home from a backpacking trip of Mexico. I had a pineapple and I declared it to a female customs officer.

"Sorry, can you say that again?"

"I've got a pineapple."

She called over a couple of her colleagues so they could listen.......

" My God....I just love the way you Brits speak..."

Reminds me of Bill Bryson's account of being asked by a waitress in the midwest where he comes from. 'Britain,' he says. 'Well honey,' she says, 'for a foreigner you speak English real good.'

 

[Flick of the Elbow]

I've lived in Edinburgh for 23 years and still can't understand the local accent. Nor can they understand me.

 

[Drago]

Reminds me of Bill Bryson's account of being asked by a waitress in the midwest where he comes from. 'Britain,' he says. 'Well honey,' she says, 'for a foreigner you speak English real good.'

That reminds me of a Derek and Clive sketch. Dudley Moore is exasperated at the 'enigmatic' behaviour of Pablo Piscasso, who is in the back of his taxi. Dud says to him, "you speak good English...for a ****"

 

[John the Monkey]

I've lived in Edinburgh for 23 years and still can't understand the local accent. Nor can they understand me.

Thank heavens for the medium of interpretive dance.

 

[Shut Up Legs]

Speaking of silly language, there's a phrase on one of the whiteboards at work (I work in a very corporate, white-collar job), which appeared there several weeks ago (or at least, that's when I noticed it). It is: "pain-gain impact". Upon seeing it, I wanted to hurl...

 

[Alex H]

And why do some commoners call the petrol station the garage?

Are you sure it's the 'petrol station'?

Why not the 'diesel station', the 'lpg station' or even the 'electric station' ?

or for an awful lot of people the 'crisp / snack station'.

 

[youngoldbloke]

A lot of the issues around English usage result from the Americanization of our language. 'Americanize' Radio 4 10.30 today http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b08qxd02 might be of interest.

 

[Drago]

Won't be long before no one is buying diesel, and LPG is an petroleum distillate.

 

[Profpointy]

For those who don't see the problem with sloppy English, here's a "spot the difference":

1) I helped my Uncle Jack off his horse
2) I helped my uncle jack off his horse

 

[Shut Up Legs]

For those who don't see the problem with sloppy English, here's a "spot the difference":

1) I helped my Uncle Jack off his horse
2) I helped my uncle jack off his horse

You might find this amusing also: http://www.ojohaven.com/fun/correct.punctuation.html
The web site has various other pages with a similar theme.

 

[swansonj]

For those who don't see the problem with sloppy English, here's a "spot the difference":

1) I helped my Uncle Jack off his horse
2) I helped my uncle jack off his horse

On the contrary, that example kind of supports the point many of us are making. The purpose of language and words is to communicate and the only test of their success is whether they were effective in communicating (which can include, incidentally, communicating ambiguity and imaginative richness as well as literal or functional meaning). Adherence to rules is not an end in itself, it is a tool to communicating, and useful only to the extent that it supports that end.

If, in your example, it mattered to me to communicate which alternative I intended, the onus is on me to use words to make my meaning clear - not to rely on the recipient understanding some arbitrary set of rules about capitals and commas in the same way as me.

 

[Profpointy]

On the contrary, that example kind of supports the point many of us are making. The purpose of language and words is to communicate and the only test of their success is whether they were effective in communicating (which can include, incidentally, communicating ambiguity and imaginative richness as well as literal or functional meaning). Adherence to rules is not an end in itself, it is a tool to communicating, and useful only to the extent that it supports that end.

If, in your example, it mattered to me to communicate which alternative I intended, the onus is on me to use words to make my meaning clear - not to rely on the recipient understanding some arbitrary set of rules about capitals and commas in the same way as me.

Given we're talking about conveying meaning I can't help noticing you start by saying "on the contrary" yet then make the same point I was (trying to) make.

 

[Drago]

On the contrary, he was.

 

[Fnaar]

Uranus gives off clouds of icy methane