HELP!! Here come the God Botherers.

Page may contain affiliate links. Please see terms for details.

PaulB

Legendary Member
Location
Colne
Just looked out the window and saw about thirty middle-aged people wandering around, knocking on doors and looking for bible fodder. One of them I see caught me unawares last week and foisted the 'Watchtower' on me and now they're coming to see what we got out of it (compost, in my case). What's the best way of getting rid of them when cometh the inevitable knock?
 
OP
OP
PaulB

PaulB

Legendary Member
Location
Colne
Uncle Mort said:
Tell them to piss off or hit them over the head with building brick and bury them under the patio.

Good one! That sounds like it might just work.
 
OP
OP
PaulB

PaulB

Legendary Member
Location
Colne
Blinkin' flip; I just read this on a site suggesting ways of getting rid of them.

I've had Jehovah's witnesses coming to my door recently and as I am fairly open minded I went to their official website to find out more about them. There is an article on there about child abuse. Imagine my horror when I read that if a Jehovah's witness child accuses another JW of abuse, the child must first try to reconcile the problem with that molester. If the abuser denies abuse then no further action will be taken as Jehovah will sort it!!!!!!!!!!!!

That's flamin' mad, innit?
 
OP
OP
PaulB

PaulB

Legendary Member
Location
Colne
Actually, I just didn't answer the door when they knocked! I was either going to do that or answer it with a copy of Richard Dawkins 'The God Delusion' in my hands but realised the ensuing conversation may have become intolerable trying to discuss stuff with such brainwashed divs. They had some serious back-up as well, there were so many of them. They'd probably have called up the senior debater to put across their point.
 
I had a friend years ago who looked like a roadie: six feet square, long ponytail, battered leather jacket and so on. He was a bit of a psycho as well. One day, two young female Jovos knocked on his door. When he opened it they said: "Good morning. Do you think there's too much evil in the world today?" "Yes, and it makes me hard" he answered snappily, and slammed the door. They never came back.:tongue:
 
I had the pleasure :tongue: of working with a religious freak once; Not a jehova a pastor in some other church.

One day at lunch in the canteen I suddenly get:
'he's talking to me you know' him;
'what' me;
'he's talking to me you know' ....... and some more religious stuff; him;
'Thats fine but I am eating, any way I'm happy with my own church' me;
I thought that last bit would shut him up even tough I hadn't been to church for 5 years. wrong!
'you can still be a member of your church and join our church too' him
I cant remember how I escaped but it was something like 'I've got to go back to my desk now.
 

upsidedown

Waiting for the great leap forward
Location
The middle bit
Our next door but one neighbours were JWs. Never seemed right that the kids didn't get birthdays or Christmas, but they celebrted their parents' wedding anniversary by being carted off to the grandparents for the weekend.
 

Hacienda71

Mancunian in self imposed exile in leafy Cheshire
Once you accept the Watchtower you are "published" they will then keep coming back.
Personaly I would go for playing Karl Orf when they arrive and answer the door dressed as Lucifer :tongue::smile: with trident horns and a pointy tale.
 

swee'pea99

Legendary Member
They're harmless and well-meaning...don't be unnecessarily nasty. I generally find a smile and a friendly but firm 'not interested, thanks,' does the trick. If they don't take the hint I close the door. Simples.
 

BSRU

A Human Being
Location
Swindon
Ask them about dinosaurs and the fact JW think the Earth is only 10,000 years old, they always go away when I ask them anything scientific that contradicts their book.
 
Top Bottom