I'm American. Ask me anything.

[Edwardoka]

We've seen mention of the simplification of English through removal of 'redundant' letters: colo(u)r, c(a)esarian etc. OK, fair enough. But then why over-complicate others? Burglarize, veterinarian?

And then why remove whole words from phrases that completely change the meaning?

"I could care less". This literally means the opposite of what it's supposed to.
"The proof is in the pudding". No, the proof of the pudding is in the eating.

Obligatory

View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8Gv0H-vPoDc
(Shame about the mild slur, but he didn't know and issued an apology. Classy guy)

 

[classic33]

This should be an easy question. Apologies if already covered. What brought you to the UK?

Boeing 747/400?

 

[flake99please]

All you can eat restaurant recommendations for...

Breakfast

Lunch

Dinner

 

[Mr Celine]

This should be an easy question. Apologies if already covered. What brought you to the UK?

He answered that last week. It's in this post, half way down.

See, I told me.

View attachment 515388

Demand is far greater than anticipated. Now I know what Ocado feels like. There’s enough material here to last weeks,



though I’m sensing time is of the essence for some of you.

The fairest system is first come first served. Life isn’t always fair. Therefore I will answer some of these in order of importance, and the rest in a way which may appear random but which follows a complex weighting of variables including what best lends itself to a quick cheap laugh.

That said, Hugh, you got in first:



Americans will recognise either mudguards or fenders on a bike, depending on their station in life. Sheldon Brown found it necessary to put mudguards in quotes; make of that what you will.



On earth? In the UK? On CC?
1. Sometimes when two people love each other very much, they rub against each other in just the right way and a baby pops out.
2. A pretty cool UK company hired my wife, and as we were an item, she brought me along.
3. I make some life decisions based on titles of pop songs.


The best grits are made with hominy. I hope that clears that up.
In a pinch they can also be used as they are in the UK, to make roads safer in the winter. Besides being a staple of southern cuisine, they can refer to that part of the anatomy which in some contexts is also considered a delicacy.

Biscuits and gravy go together like fish and chips.



One cannot assume cream and jam are “right there” on an American breakfast table.

We can pronounce “Graham” just fine, thank you.



If the Grape Nuts people themselves can't provide a definitive answer, nor am I likely to. The only observation I have is that whatever they are, they’re bloody expensive at Selfridges on Oxford Street in London.

Mr Cheez Whiz did some good: god only knows if it balances out the bad.



Only the deplorables.

If we keep asking him the same thing over and over again he might get fed up and where's the fun in that? We'd have to go back to reading @Drago 's daily 'cyclechat investigates' nonsense.

 

[Rusty Nails]

He answered that last week. It's in this post, half way down.
If we keep asking him the same thing over and over again he might get fed up and where's the fun in that? We'd have to go back to reading @Drago 's daily 'cyclechat investigates' nonsense.

I don't know about getting fed up, but I doubt he expected the amount of effort he would have to put in to answer the queries. He's done a great job so far.

 

[anothersam]

All you can eat restaurant recommendations for...
Breakfast
Lunch
Dinner

Breakfast
Any establishment offering pancakes and actual maple syrup should do the trick. IHOP (International House Of Pancakes – legitimately multinational in that regions served include North and portions of Central America, as well as discerning client states in the Middle East), does not appear to qualify, unless you’re in Vermont.

View: https://youtu.be/MeRghYqi090

Give that lad a stack for not doing a Thelma & Louise

Lunch
Denny’s, with “breakfast all day, every day, 365 days a year,” at least in days of yore. Because breakfast is so good it deserves two chances.

View: https://youtu.be/GX-m7UsCp3I

Scene of many a cinematic debrief - and free on your bithday

Dinner
I was going to say Denny’s again, but it might start seeming like product placement. Besides, variety is the spice of life. Pick an authentic diner and enjoy.

View: https://youtu.be/1x9YACdBUrU

Why is Independence Day celebrated on the 4th July, when the "paperwork" declaring said indepenence wasn't signed until the 2nd of August the same year, 1776.

Because although it was a nation founded largely by lawyers, the signing of the parchment was deemed less symbolically important than the date that Congress approved the final text. Which was the 4th.

If you were driving on most right hand lane of an eight lane road and you wanted to turn left at the next junction, when should you start making your manoeuvre?

Last Friday.

Why do Americans like to quantify how much Irish or Scottish ancestry they have? But rarely English?

Because then they’d be admitting they’re part villain.

View: https://youtu.be/WJgo30daNVo

British = English for the purposes of this reply only

Who is the patron saint of the USA?

Blessed Holy Mary of the Immaculate Conception.

Indeed. And people say we don’t get irony.

Serious one: what do Americans think of their intensive farming practices?

I’m sure those who give it some thought aren’t best pleased. Those who aren’t bothered outsource their thinking to Monsanto, which is 63% evil at last reckoning.

An affiliate of Burns Enterprises

Fun fact: The last CEO of Monsanto was Hugh Grant.

This should be an easy question. Apologies if already covered. What brought you to the UK

He answered that last week.
If we keep asking him the same thing over and over again he might get fed up and where's the fun in that?

I don't know about getting fed up, but I doubt he expected the amount of effort he would have to put in to answer the queries.

It’s 2.14 in the morning and I should really be either sleeping or planning my next heist in aid of a comfortable retirement. Instead you’ve taken me down whatsits lane.

Slightly less brief than my reply last week:
In the early 80s my older sister was stationed at RAF Mildenhall. As a teenager I hopped over the pond for a visit, my chief exposure to this land having been An American Werewolf in London. Upon alighting, I hitchhiked into London, the train apparently making too pedestrian an entrance. Spent a month here, leaving with mostly fond memories. Definitely no bites.

My wife lived in south London (Catford, to be precise) for a short time in the 70s, as a child. She also came away with a pleasant aftertaste. After the cool British company mentioned upthread hired her, we were given the option to relocate, expecting to stay for a year or two at most. She proved unsurprisingly invaluable to them. We settled in for the long haul, and I started freewheelin' in earnest.

Have bike, will travel

Obligatory
(Shame about the mild slur, but he didn't know and issued an apology. Classy guy)

Much appreciated, I hadn’t seen that one. That just may land on my iPod to take my mind off remedial hill climbing. (The S word as slur wouldn’t have occurred to me either, before moving here. Not that it figured in my vocabulary in the first place.)

My vote is for Alfred Matthew Yankovic as patron saint.

View: https://youtu.be/lOfZLb33uCg

Dare to be stupid sublime: Airplane! meets ER

 

[anothersam]

That young Kirk video was meant to include a trivial link about how that scene was filmed in Vermont. In future you may want to start reading this thread backwards.

 

[Ming the Merciless]

What would you recommend as the best made in the USA disinfectant to drink to tackle the virus?

 

[MichaelW2]

I know the way to Amarillo.

Here's me helping out Tony Christie and Peter Kay
. View attachment 517267

Do you know the way to San Jose?

 

[Ming the Merciless]

If I use UV light inside the body to kill the virus, will I also get a sun tan?

 

[sheddy]

Have we covered Restrooms ?

I was so disappointed on my 1st day working at a US company to discover that there were no sofas or chairs inside them.

Oops we have - sorry

 

[Mark Grant]

Why, in films at least do Americans seem to use 'Poyndexter' as a derogatory term?

 

[Domus]

Speaking of restrooms, stopped at a service area on the Interstate and saw these two signs.

Don't get these on the M6.

 

[Rusty Nails]

Denny's is good for breakfasts generally, but why do they insist on burning the bacon to death?

 

[MichaelW2]

Why has the Donald had great ratings his whole life?

Are you including credit ratings?