Impending moments of Doom - not too serious please

[PaulSB]

Back in late summer 2021 I had three days in the Lakes with a buddy who loves to climb. My pads probably needed replacing. It was about a month before I was due to ride The Fred. My buddy decided we would do a bit of training so we rode Hardknott, Wrynose (easy side) and The Struggle. Said buddy decided we should have a go at Honister for good measure..............and so the fun started. I was a Honister virgin.

We ascended from the Borrowdale side. Brutal doesn't come into it. We began the descent towards Buttermere which is +/-25% at the top. I began to realise the brakes weren't holding enough. Halfway down I spotted the slight S bend over a stone bridge. Didn't know about this. Hurtling towards said bend I managed to scrub some speed with the brakes screaming, leaned hard over as I entered the righthand S, somehow chucked the bike left for the exit and saw my front wheel inches from the slightly raised stone kerb.............flew out of the bend and straightened up!!

While all this was happening my brain was playing a video of Paul flying through the air.......

My buddy later remarked "That's the bridge they sometimes line with old mattresses!"

On The Fred I had new pads, knew about the bend and sedately rode through it.

 

[Specialeyes]

52mph, downhill (of course) on Eroica Britannia this year, on my 1974 Bianchi which I'd fitted with suicide levers just for the event!

...shortly after which I noticed that the crappy little bolt holding the right-hand Weinmann suicide lever was coming undone and the whole brake lever was starting to disassemble

Cue frantic hand-tightening of the bolt, enough to be able to take the pressure, which stopped the loosening vibrations so I could use the front brake as well, and come to a stop.

That was EB 2016 in the Peak District.

 

[Peter Salt]

To me, it's funny how time seemingly slows down once you know you're about to go down.

My last one was on a bit of gravel scattered round a tight bend, there was a small hump just before it - so I didn't see the surface of the corner. As I was going over that hump, probably around 25mph, I noticed the sand/gravel. My engineers mind kicked in, I knew what speed I was going, I saw how tight the corner was, I understood that I'll need to lean the bike in, and I knew there's no way I'm staying upright with that sort of lean through this dirt. It was too late to do anything about it, other than brace shoulders for impact. Must have been less than a second before realising and coming off, but it felt like half a minute.

Fell down, got up, carried on. Not a scratch due to gloves and winter jacket. Scuffed bar tape and pedal.

 

[kingrollo]

Every morning I wake up and discover I'm not married to Elizabeth Montgomery.

 

[Moodyman]

Gentle downhill, squirrel comes into the road from the left verge. No problem me thinks, he’ll be into the middle of the road when I get to him.

Squirrel spots another cyclist coming in the other direction. Squirrel panicked and turns back. Then panics again when he can see me coming towards him. A couple of frantic seconds of will he/won’t he. Sharp braking. He finally chose to carry on across the road. Phew.

 

[Jameshow]

Gentle downhill, squirrel comes into the road from the left verge. No problem me thinks, he’ll be into the middle of the road when I get to him.

Squirrel spots another cyclist coming in the other direction. Squirrel panicked and turns back. Then panics again when he can see me coming towards him. A couple of frantic seconds of will he/won’t he. Sharp braking. He finally chose to carry on across the road. Phew.

There was a chap on what's your emergency who had tried to dodge 4 squirrels and ended up kissing the tarmac and making acquaintances with paramedics!!

 

[Moodyman]

There was a chap on what's your emergency who had tried to dodge 4 squirrels and ended up kissing the tarmac and making acquaintances with paramedics!!

Seems to be a common hazard for cyclists. Plenty of squirrel in spokes in Google images.

 

[a.twiddler]

Seems to be a common hazard for cyclists. Plenty of squirrel in spokes in Google images.

Is it the same squirrel?

 

[Supersuperleeds]

I was riding a few years ago on a nice straight road, all of a sudden I thought bugger, I’m going into the ditch, and I did. Managed to stay on the bike though

To this day I still don’t know why or how I managed to go off the road, luckily I wasn’t far from home (yes it was a road I’ve ridden dozens of times) and no I’ve never done it again.

 

[HLaB]

So what moments can you share (nothing too serious).

This morning, on the way to work, saw some 'stuff' stuck to the outer edges of the tyre/sidewall. Noticed it was either side and was slowly starting to come away. Dog poop.... argh.

Even taking to the damp grass didn't shift it. Carried on riding, going round corners didn't move it. Revolution by revolution it looked like it might detach. Argh.

Got to work, dropped the panniers off, and there I was dragging the front wheel along the tarmac to get the stuff off. Blurgh.

I had that moment through the week but I had the grass verge to drag it through! I hope I got it all because the next night I deflated the tyre and refilled it with sealant.

 

[Solocle]

Descending from Mere Down, absolutely flying down there, enter the nice sweeping bend at the bottom just before going under the A303 and clock 52 mph.

Now the road curves left, so I position to the centre. My line goes slightly too wide, and I enter the hatchings. Which are covered with gravel. So I'm approaching a traffic island at 50 mph with gravel under my tyres. By some miracle I was able to firmly brake to 30 mph, before I then cornered to avoid the island. But that was pretty sketchy!

Or there's mountain biking a couple of weeks ago. Going down the easiest trail at Okeford Hill a few times (it's still a red!), and having done an embarrassing faceplant the very first descent (too much air in my tyres), I finally was getting into the swing of it, so let it rip. I hit a tabletop, and launched off it,
despite having a grand total of zero experience jumping such features. And then it's straight into a berm. Well, I landed it first time! But the second time, well, not so much...

 

[Punkawallah]

Happily survived a Close Encounter on a new Boardman with hydraulic disc brakes. Going through a crossroads when an oncoming car decided to turn right - through my line. Anchors hauled, bike bounces on locked wheels, sphincter closes to f64, car blithely sails away. Those brakes are a faff, but bloody good.

 

[Scotchlovingcylist]

Years ago entering a roundabout a car decided to pull out onto too from the left. Both looked at each other startled as my bike hit the front wing, I rolled over the bonnet and somehow managed to land on my feet dukes of hazzard stule. Luckily more damage to the car than anything else and the comedy value lightened the annoyance

 

[grldtnr]

I remember going to the Mildenhall rally with my new recumbent trike, having a bit of fun in the carpark getting acquainted with the handling , chasing another triker around.
They dived of around a corner, which led to a dead end with a deep kerb, he peeled off ,I hadn't seen it, in desperation I braked very hard, recumbent trikes have brakes on the front wheels, I had a little bit of turn input, the trike tipped forward lifted the back wheel pirouetted around , dumped the back wheel, and I shot straight back out!
My new found oppo was dumbfounded,, 'how did that happen?' I couldn't tell him ,I didn't know my self, still the fates looked after my new trike that day.
They weren't so kind another time, but that's another day.

 

[Mad Doug Biker]

Many years ago (late 80's) I was out on a solo run round the top end of the North York Moors, having just passed through Westerdale, back up onto the moors and was descending northwards down towards Hob Hole beck (at around forty miles an hour) to be suddenly greeted by a frolicking spring lamb darting out into the road up ahead of me..... I panic braked, locked up the back wheel and almost browned my shorts! Proper everything goes into slow motion moment, luckily it must have seen the terrified cyclist slithering down the hill and did an immediate ewe-turn () and shot back into the grass. I thought I had got off scot free until I heard a strange flapping sound from behind, turned out I'd ripped a couple of inches of tread off the carcass of my nearly new Hutchinson folding tyre! I think I glued it back on with rubber cement until I got home whereupon it was superglued and had a full & long life afterwards, probably longer than the woolly kebab from Westerdale.

Gentle downhill, squirrel comes into the road from the left verge. No problem me thinks, he’ll be into the middle of the road when I get to him.

Squirrel spots another cyclist coming in the other direction. Squirrel panicked and turns back. Then panics again when he can see me coming towards him. A couple of frantic seconds of will he/won’t he. Sharp braking. He finally chose to carry on across the road. Phew.

Not lambs or squirrels, but I did have a close call with a rabbit whilst descending at a great rate of knots once. It had decided to run beside me, so it was watching me and I was watching it.
I was just hoping it didn't decide to commit suicide in my front wheel and as it turned out, it then veered away after what seemed a very long time (but must only have been a few seconds).

This was the ride where not soon after, a fox also appeared and ran with me in the road and then a deer ran across in front of me too. 😎

I was riding a few years ago on a nice straight road, all of a sudden I thought bugger, I’m going into the ditch, and I did. Managed to stay on the bike though

To this day I still don’t know why or how I managed to go off the road, luckily I wasn’t far from home (yes it was a road I’ve ridden dozens of times) and no I’ve never done it again.

I last rode into a ditch when I was 5. I didn't know what brakes were! 😆

Walking the SWCP in 2007 solo. Following the path and it starts to get a bit treacherous but I persevere, sliding over rocks on my bum as it gets even steeper. Get to a place and realise that the route couldn't possibly be meant to be this dangerous. I turn back, as I scrambled back up the rocks I realise how precarious my posotion was. Get back to safer ground and start retracing my steps across a field. As I look back the way that I've just come I see a big sign saying something to the effect : " Danger Landslip - Path Closed " with an arrow pointing to an alternate route. I'd walked right past it and didn't notice!

Years ago, I fell off a small cliff years ago whilst climbing down and landed quite badly, so I now have a 'thing' about descending.
Anyway, a month or so ago, I was casually hiking and climbing along a bit of coast line up north (Assynt area) and I came to a bit I thought I could climb around instead of walk along the top of, so I started to do as such.
Everything was going well, I had basalt cliff in front of me, sea behind and I was making my way around , gradually ascending as I went.
This was, until I reached a point (previously unseen by me) where the cliff suddenly went into a vertical drop down to the sea. I couldn't continue as I was just out casually climbing.

I then had to very carefully make my way back, climbing down, often not seeing my feet.
I had this horrible feeling that I was about to fall off and land on the rocks/in the sea below.
As it turned out, I was fine, but it was a bit hairy for a while.

Not one of my brightest moves!