Keeping your tackle warm

[shouldbeinbed]

Warm breath down the shorts is the only solution...

...so choose your cafe stop carefully or you'll be relying on your ride buddies.

Good grief, if I was that flexible I'd be an internet sensation.

 

[User32269]

On a miro penis tagged thread...don't look great on ones "digital footprint"

 

[steve50]

On a miro penis tagged thread...don't look great on ones "digital footprint"

that's as maybe but it is a pretty accurate description of how my wedding tackle looked after that particular ride

 

[subaqua]

in answer to the OP . ride harder , get the blood flowing properly and get out of saddle a little more often. I have never had a problem like that.

in response to deep heat , ralgex etc. then NOOOOOOOOOOO.

a friend of mine was getting frisky with his wife and was going to be , errm , well erm , going somewhere else shall we say. the lights were off and she grabbed what she thought was vaseline..... yes you know where this heads..... it wasn't and she liberally applied a dollop of vicks vaporub to a part of his anatomy that shouldnt get it.

oh how we laughed in work.

 

[steveindenmark]

My biggest problem is keeping it out of the spokes in summer. I'm glad to get my winter bib on to tuck it away.

 

[MichaelW2]

You can electrically-heated trousers and motorcyclists have electrically-heated saddle.
A dynamo powered, heated saddle cover would do the trick.
I like the idea of small, furry mammal, preferably without sharp teeth.

 

[steve50]

in answer to the OP . ride harder , get the blood flowing properly and get out of saddle a little more often. I have never had a problem like that.

Believe me when I say I was riding as hard as I could up a 4 mile stretch of hill blowing like an antique traction engine heading directly into thick, damp, freezing cold fog and when i crested the hill it was all downhill for approximately 2 miles and still bloody cold. I was dressed in the wrong kit freezing my ruddy nads off as I had no idea it was going to that cold over the hill tops.
Lesson learnt, i will be better prepared next time.

 

[vickster]

Carry an instant heatpack in. case of ice cube emergency?

https://www.icepacks4less.co.uk/Hea...pl=STD&ccv=Y&gclid=CMuXl6OJu8gCFUUTwwodsZIPDw

 

[Bazzer]

Never particulalry noticed the cold down there myself, but unless you are planning on using it for something other than peeing, immediately after being on your bike, does it matter? And if you are planning on using it for something other than peeing, you clearly didn't work hard enough when on your bike.

 

[User16625]

Can the Mrs knit?

I will buy 2, XXXX Large.

 

[cosmicbike]

Someone needs to invent a strapping device.

Gaffer tape?

 

[Andy_R]

I read that initially as kitten

 

[jefmcg]

Gaffer tape?

A sock, a pair of tights and some - hopefully sharp - scissors.

Full instructions here



(youtube puts a warning on this, but it's harmless unless you find the fact that drag queens exist is offensive. I've watched it all the way through; he's charming. My favourite bit is when he walks off to get changed and leaves the camera running.)

 

[vickster]

I will buy 2, XXXX Large.

You have two penises

 

[steve50]

You have two penises

the mind boggles