Musical Instruments Which Grate

[Andy in Sig]

For the second day in a row while driving to work the current affairs channel which I have on the car radio has chosen soprano saxophone music to fill the gaps between articles. It dawned on me how much I instinctively abhor the petulant, tarty sound of that instrument and then I remembered an old rule of thumb which was that if a sitcom has a soprano sax in the theme tune it is likely to be crap. The other instrument which usually annoys me is another squeaky one: the violin. I find it quite tolerable when involved in reels and folk music but generally speaking a bit of a nause in orchestras and certainly in the scenario where an untrustworthy looking type pesters restaurant guests with his playing.

So what other instruments annoy?

 

[Aperitif]

Down the pan pipes.

Reminds me of chiffony billowy material rippling around Nana Mouskouri, Demis Roussos etc or a bunch of those locals wearing national costume in a hazy sun type of scene...

 

[Andy in Sig]

I really rate Courtney Pine (the jazz sax player) but even when he picks up a soprano sax I could cheerfully ram it up his arse. It's funny how people react so differently to the same thing, isn't it?

 

[graham56]

The clarinet that my missus is learning to play.

 

[Alan Frame]

A comb combined with Izal bog paper.

 

[PaulB]

I cannot abide the grating sickly-sweet violin playing of Yehudi Menuhin and his legion of imposters. Also, I never used to mind the saxaphone but John Peel commented on his loathing of it on most records saying it was generally used to cover up poor songs, lyrics or passages. Now whenever I hear a sax in a song, I tend to listen out to see what it is they're covering up!

 

[just jim]

Saxaphone.

 

[Gerry Attrick]

Classical clarinet in, for example Mozart's clarinet concerto. It is the singular most depressing, whining, doleful din that was ever written to manuscript. If it ever comes on the radio I have to turn it off.

 

[Mr Pig]

I love the violin and the soprano sax. But any instrument played badly or in the wrong context grates.

Exactly. The violin is fine but unless it's played well it's the most horrid sounding thing! One of my neighbours plays the violin and to be honest he should just give up. It's an appalling racket but no one seems to have the heart to tell him. Well his whole family are tone deaf so they probably don't know how bad he is! ;0)

 

[NickM]

The recorder. An instrument of torture

 

[Smokin Joe]

The piano. I just hate it, it doesn't sound even remotely like music.

 

[Chuffy]

The recorder. An instrument of torture

Especially if you use it in ways other than as a musical instrument...

I was listening to Pink Floyd the other day (Momentary Lapse of Reason) and it features the typically mid-late 80's sound of the soprano saxophone (think Kenny G, or Wynton Marsalis on Sting's early solo albums).

I hate it.

 

[Piemaster]

+1 for violin.
Unfortunately my daughter is starting lessons and very keen.
Fortunately I am pretty much tone deaf and the only musical thing I can play is the radio

 

[swee'pea99]

How in the world has this thread got this far without a mention of the bagpipes? I mean the accordian's bad enough, but bagpipes were surely invented to annoy.

 

[gavintc]

The piped bagpipe musak you get from the cheap tat tourist shops at the west end of Princes St in Edinburgh - dreadful