Oft-heard cycling phrases that get on your nerves

[John the Monkey]

I detest that one...sorry footballists but guys wearing football shirts and calling themselves "sporty" because they can recite the winning goal in the 1964 world cup (ducks) ...whilst never playing a game.

One of my favourite heckles was from a youngster mocking me for "being done up like the Tour de France" (I was wearing baggy shorts and a t-shirt, but admittedly did have SPD shoes on) who was wearing enormous faux running shoe trainers, and a tracksuit.

The inherent irony had escaped him.

Also, people stuck in traffic jams who shout "Why don't you get the bus?" as you're whizzing past them on the bikepath.

 

[youngoldbloke]

'shod' as in 'trusty steed shod with Marathon +'

 

[Fab Foodie]

Use of km and kph instead of miles and mph when talking about rides in the UK

Audax uses KM's which is part of the reason .... Otherwise I don't see the point.

 

[PK99]

Use of km and kph instead of miles and mph when talking about rides in the UK

Flick of the elbow

 

[Fab Foodie]

- but what do you call to inform the group?

My Butler tends to use something along the lines of:
'Excuse me my good cycling fellows, and I'm sorry to shout of course, but I should just mention at this precise moment that there is some form of motorised conveyance abaft the group' ...

Much better.

 

[hopless500]

My Butler tends to use something along the lines of:
'Excuse me my good cycling fellows, and I'm sorry to shout of course, but I should just mention at this precise moment that there is some form of motorised conveyance abaft the group' ...

Much better.

Very civilised

 

[Piemaster]

"you wear lycra then....at your age? Yeah and you wear a football shirt....at your age(and probably tuck your shirt into your underpants).

I hate that too. I wear all sorts of stuff 'at your age' that people probably think wrong. I've never dressed like I'm going to church everytime I go out the door and I'm not planning on changing that.

 

[bpsmith]

View attachment 77734

 

[Sittingduck]

Fixie instead of fixed

This!!

 

[format]

Last time I looked, a sportive isn't a race. If you want to compete, go for it but if you're a regular, non-competitive cyclist surely there's no need to train for anything is there?

Hah, alright. Tell you what. Stop cycling from now until the end of May. Come and do the 3 pistes sportive with me and we'll see what happens when somebody thinks it's okay to do any old sportive with no training. Maybe you're naturally athletic but I was in decent shape for it last year and it still nearly ended me.

Would you attempt to run a marathon tomorrow, with no training? I mean, it's not a race, so you should just be to do with no training, right?

If you want to constrain yourself to that, by all means but I think it's bizarre that you're dictated what you ride depending on what time of year it is. Unless there's adverse conditions, I'll ride the ride I want at any time of year.

Tony.

Well, I work 9-5 plus occasionally at the weekends. My workplace is sadly too far for me to commute (100 mile round trip), I don't like riding on country lanes in the dark, and riding on busy roads isn't my idea of fun, which means that weekdays are a no-go until it gets lighter in the evenings.

Furthermore, I don't like riding in ice, snow or wind over 20mph, and there's plenty of that from November through to February here, which means my already shortened riding time is restricted even further.

Sorry I'm not as hard as you! I just don't particularly like going out and being blown into traffic, or crashing my bike on ice etc.

 

[format]

Primary
Secondary

What's wrong with 'near the kerb' 'in middle of the road'

Middle of the road could mean in the middle of the dividing line. That's not the same as primary at all.

 

[w00hoo_kent]

Hah, alright. Tell you what. Stop cycling from now until the end of May. Come and do the 3 pistes sportive with me and we'll see what happens when somebody thinks it's okay to do any old sportive with no training. Maybe you're naturally athletic but I was in decent shape for it last year and it still nearly ended me.
Would you attempt to run a marathon tomorrow, with no training? I mean, it's not a race, so you should just be to do with no training, right?

Just being Devils Advocate really, but is it possible that some sportives are really just races that nobody records the time for nowadays? Should they be more like charity rides, is the London to Brighton a sportive?

As for marathons, I think a lot of them are races and do note who the winner was. You may be thinking of fun runs :-)

 

[Markymark]

Primary
Secondary

What's wrong with 'near the kerb' 'in middle of the road'

Because it also states the order of preference for riding position. Primary first, secondary, well, second.

 

[format]

Just being Devils Advocate really, but is it possible that some sportives are really just races that nobody records the time for nowadays? Should they be more like charity rides, is the London to Brighton a sportive?

As for marathons, I think a lot of them are races and do note who the winner was. You may be thinking of fun runs :-)

When I ride sportives, I don't do it under any illusion that I'm competing against anyone except myself. I think it's the same for most people tbh, although I've only ever done a few sportives in the past.

 

[Deleted member 35268]

Hah, alright. Tell you what. Stop cycling from now until the end of May. Come and do the 3 pistes sportive with me and we'll see what happens when somebody thinks it's okay to do any old sportive with no training. Maybe you're naturally athletic but I was in decent shape for it last year and it still nearly ended me.

Would you attempt to run a marathon tomorrow, with no training? I mean, it's not a race, so you should just be to do with no training, right?






Well, I work 9-5 plus occasionally at the weekends. My workplace is sadly too far for me to commute (100 mile round trip), I don't like riding on country lanes in the dark, and riding on busy roads isn't my idea of fun, which means that weekdays are a no-go until it gets lighter in the evenings.

Furthermore, I don't like riding in ice, snow or wind over 20mph, and there's plenty of that from November through to February here, which means my already shortened riding time is restricted even further.

Sorry I'm not as hard as you! I just don't particularly like going out and being blown into traffic, or crashing my bike on ice etc.

Do you get lunch breaks ?
Anywhere you can go for a ride during the day ?

I'm lucky to be able to do this. Beats sitting at my desk eating a sandwich.