Pointless / stupid things shouted at you whilst on a bike #364

[jarlrmai]

jesus, that is assault.

 

[manalog]

A Middle age man walking ahead of us shouted 'you should be on the road' except I wasn't cycling on the pavement my 5 year old son was! WTF

 

[Shut Up Legs]

Never really had any smart-ass shouting, but when I was 12, I used to ride an MTB on the pavement and had really long, curly hair. That hair almost got decapitated once, when a group of girls took a fancy to it as I rode past and thought they'd have a go at stroking it (without me stopping). I have to hand it to them for spotting the hair in the pitch black darkness, though.

Other than that, I probably haven't been cycling through the right places. There were some drunk ladies after what looked like a hen-do calling out for some sort of superhero known as 'Cyclist-man' a few weeks back... the University is always a mess.

Oh yeah, that'd be this guy:

 

[GlenBen]

I love this thread, Ive actually been laughing for ages at some of those.

Unfortunatly all I ever seem to get is

"Get ON the pavement (insert offensive word)"

 

[BenM]

last night.. Corsage full of 'boyz', "you lazy git, stop lying down and get a proper bike"... they were going the same way as I was which is how I got to actually understand what they were saying

it has just occurred to me the bike is worth more than their car was!

 

[Deleted member 20519]

"On yer bike!"

Yes. Yes I am.

 

[Boris Bajic]

"Oy mate, are you gay?"

I was wearing an ancient replica maglia rosa, so my normally very butch and straight appearance might have been slightly skewed.

Not that I'm bothered by this sort of remark. Quite the opposite. Some of my best friends, after all, are... Well, I'm sure you know what I mean. Actually none of my bes friends are.

And if a man is comfortable within himself he can get away with a little pink in his clothing. Well, I suppose it's closer to a salmon or a cerise, maybe a bright fuscia, but you know what I mean.

 

[youngoldbloke]

"On yer bike!"

Yes. Yes I am.

Me too - I congratulated them on their powers of observation.

 

[ianrauk]

I've told this story before.

I was tacking behind a fully lycra'd up roadie one evening on my commute home.
We stopped at a junction. Next to us was a little hatch with a couple of chavs inside.
Passenger shouted to the roadie. "You look gay mate". To which the roadie quick as a flash came back with "When I'm shagging your mum I'm not".
I near fell of my bike laughing.

 

[i hate hills]

I've had "gie's a backie" so many times.

 

[Buzzinonbikes]

"Are you enjoying the Tour de Stockport?!" On a recent club ride haha

 

[sickboyblue]

Just had a cracker, cycling past a group of kids10/11 years old i hear "Eeeyaaar ( anyone from Manchester will tell you the type of person that says this won't be out of place on the set of shameless) da marafonz finished mate" The future of our country right there! Where's my passport?

 

[i hate hills]

Thanks to someone on the predecessor to this, the C+ forum, or was it URC? Can't remember, anyway, this was one of my best comebacks ever. He tried to chase me down after I retorted.

p.s. apols if you've seen it before.

Love it . Can i please use that one ?

 

[BentMikey]

Natch, it's not my saying, but one I learnt from someone else. I bet it's as old as the bicycle.

 

[Matthew_T]

People only really shout at me during summer as windows are open so yobs like to take the opportunity.

It used to bother me but it doesnt now. All I do now is just add the vehicle to my database so that if something serious happens, I can refer to it.