the recovery

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byegad

Legendary Member
Location
NE England
I am disappointed that I will not be seeing you in uniform. I am, however, not ready to decide if it will make you dashingly handsome. How long will I need to wait? :popcorn::reading:

Get your eyes checked, FAST!
 

byegad

Legendary Member
Location
NE England
This none bot/none girl thing is getting confusing.

Girls wear lumpy jumpers* and dance backwards and boys wear none lumpy jumpers and dance forwards. Am I right?

* I suspect Lady Byegad slips her used lumpy jumpers into my wardrobe when the lumps slip down far enough and coalesce. That would explain the fact that I haven't seen my knees when standing up for some time.
 

Speicher

Vice Admiral
Moderator
Ginger Rogers did everything that Fred Astaire did, but she did it backwards and in high heels!
:girldance:

This morning I nearly had to fill in an incident report when someone was nearly hit on the head by the hungry caterpillar. :scratch:
 
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markg0vbr

markg0vbr

Über Member
as it has been very windy i did the big hills today, it was quite good; not a lot of miles but some good steep hills.

if a lumpy jumper is not a boy and not a multi lumpy or mono lumpy jumper is a boy:scratch: who is in the gorilla costume? to figer that one out you have to wait until they go to the lavatory, the not boys go in twos to give each other a leg up as they tend to be shorter than boys. i think that is the only difference:huh:

i once had to fill in a accident report when one of the deep thinkers, decided to bleed the air out of his radiator as his office was cold, he removed the screw at the top of the radiator that filed up with red hot water and started spurting out all over the book case full of expensive law books, so he put a finger over the end of the radiator, in the end we managed to turn the water off at the valve, he had 8 badly burned fingers and 1 thumb in the end.
gosh i wish i was one of the mega minds on the top floor, they are terrific, always coming up with fantastic ideas:rolleyes: .
 
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markg0vbr

markg0vbr

Über Member
i totally wimpeded out today, as it was very cold and windy. tomorrow it is the inquisition the HR they make the Spanish inquisitors look like amatory wimps.
i will hopefully finely get some idea what they have decided to do with me. help.... i want my mummy!
 

Scoosh

Velocouchiste
Moderator
Location
Edinburgh
I'm sure, if you show HR your SBGG figure and visage, they will crumple and be like putty in your hands. [best leave the skull-and-crossbones behind this time - you can jolly roger them later]

They'll probably give you a rise in pay :wahhey: and ask you to use your 3-wheeled advertising wagon to extol their virtue to all and sundry (even though it will be mondry by then).
 

byegad

Legendary Member
Location
NE England
I'm sure, if you show HR your SBGG figure and visage, they will crumple and be like putty in your hands. [best leave the skull-and-crossbones behind this time - you can jolly roger them later]

They'll probably give you a rise in pay :wahhey: and ask you to use your 3-wheeled advertising wagon to extol their virtue to all and sundry (even though it will be mondry by then).

On the other hand they may recoil in revulsion and decide to get you another role. If they do don't ask for a Tuna roll as they are stuffed with Mayonnaise and Dolphin.
Apparently Old Mad Fred of Holmfirth has died and the job of Village Idiot is up for grabs. Alternatively, maybe you could get a grant and become a travelling performance artist? You would just be expected to ride 30 miles a day, five days a week. After a full year you'd be nearly 4000 miles away and so an SEP*.

*SEP? Somebody else's problem.
 
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markg0vbr

markg0vbr

Über Member
all went well...... praise was heaped on my achievements and a shine new job has been created* i am to be ..... The Admin Guru** part time at my request, so i can pursue my other interests, get my feet up a bit ie trike :wahhey:


*short fat manager stands on the conference table and with a flourish shouted, behold creation and rubber stamped my transfer card.
** a crack team of ninja admin specialist, trawling the central admin pit, looking for problems, encouraging staff(i already know where i can lay my hands on a riding crop) set the tempo of the drums ect.
 

Speicher

Vice Admiral
Moderator
Have they given you the keys to the stationary cupboard. Please do not try to move it, it should stay where it is. :giggle:

Once the cupboard is unlocked you can give your underlings the following:

a paper clip round the ear
an empty box around the ears

If you get a folder you could keep it safely in there. Always providing there is room, you might need to take the wheels off first.

Or you could give your underlings your stamp of approval.
What will your staple diet be now?

Letters be the first to know your plans.
 
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