things teenage girls say

[Mad Doug Biker]

I have a 3 month old daughter and am dreading her using sentences like this!

To be fair though, I doubt she will ever say that she holds her Daddy's willy like that unless you have been doing something you shouldn't have...

 

[alans]

At the dinner table with assembled in laws etc ...Daughter then aged 9 ( now 36) " Daaaad, what's a blow job".....

This question was asked,of the audiance,by a mature lady during a speech she made after recieving an award for working at the same place for 25yrs.
The ceremony took place in the works canteen.

 

[alecstilleyedye]

in a similar vain, i had my father in law ask what a milf is…

back to the op, i've today had my teenage daughter come downstairs complaining that the music is too loud… something a bit awry there…

 

[Archie_tect]

Alec... happens to me all the time. You're going deaf.

 

[MontyVeda]

I maybe shouldnt post this cause it makes both me and the girlfriend look bad but recently she has been asking the most stupid questions ever (and shes 21 and not blonde btw)

"Is paris in france?"
"I thought kenya was in England"
"I thought you needed to get a boat to get to Wales"

Years ago she thought Haggis was a real animal aswell

Theres more but i cant remember them at the moment

she's not alone. A few years ago one of my friends (female, 30's) wouldn't believe me when I pointed out Venus in the evening sky. "you can't see the planets because they're too far away!" She claimed. I tried to explain it but she just wouldn't have any of it, instead convinced that I'm an idiot for thinking i could see a planet

Another friend (male, 30's) p!ssed himself laughing at me when I suggested an intermittent PC fault could be due to a dry joint which only connects when the metal has warmed up a bit (cue blank stare from him) "... because metal expands when it warms up" I explained. At that point he rolled around in fits of laughter as if I'd just asked "is Kenya in England?" calling me an idiot for thinking that metal gets bigger when it heats up.

it makes me wonder if some people have just teleported here from the middle ages.

 

[Mad Doug Biker]

Alec... happens to me all the time. You're going deaf.

HE SAID....



I remember the day well when my Dad asked ME what a blowjob was. If I had been thinking about it, I should have said

'Ask my Mother'.

I never did reply by the way, I was too horrified at the thought. I feel as though I should really ask him if he was being serious, but it might be too awkward a conversation

 

[Mad Doug Biker]

she's not alone. A few years ago one of my friends (female, 30's) wouldn't believe me when I pointed out Venus in the evening sky. "you can't see the planets because they're too far away!" She claimed. I tried to explain it but she just wouldn't have any of it, instead convinced that I'm an idiot for thinking i could see a planet

I had that after saying that I could see satelites going past in the night sky.
The person who said it though liked to have a joke, so I never found out if he was actually being serious or not.

That said, people really are quite stupid, it has to be said.

 

[bobg]

While we seem to be continuing on the subject of BJs, and my apologies to the OP,
Jacob.... " I've been suffering some severe abdominal pains lately"
Doctor ( after a thorough examination) " I have some bad news Jacob, may I speak to your wife while you wait outside"
Naomi.. ( worriedly) "What's the matter with him doctor " ?
Doctor " I'm afraid it's terminal but there is only one possible solution, you need to give him a blow job.
Later......Jacob " What did he say "
Naomi......... " He said you're going to die.....

 

[Archie_tect]

My son walked very proudly into playgroup when he was 4 and announced that last night his daddy did a huge poo and blocked the toilet!!
All eyes turned to me in wonder and awe.....