Worlds worst dad jokes.

[glasgowcyclist]

A man called me on the phone and said, "Prince Charming, Prince Charming, ridicule is nothing to be scared of."
I tried to tell him that he had got the wrong number but he was adamant.

Normally I wouldn't laugh at that but I've had two glasses of wine and three, possibly four, piña coladas and I'm in rather a good mood. 😂

 

[Toshiba Boy]

Normally I wouldn't laugh at that but I've had two glasses of wine and three, possibly four, piña coladas and I'm in rather a good mood. 😂

Glasgowcylist, "don't you ever, don't you ever, lower yourself, forgetting all your standards".

Oh, by the way, what do you prefer...

"Silk or leather, fur or feather?"

 

[Ming the Merciless]

At Heathrow Airport today, an individual, later discovered to be a school teacher, was arrested trying to board a flight while in possession of a compass, a protractor, and a graphical calculator.

Authorities believe he is a member of the notorious Al-Gebra movement, which has struck terror into the lives of many for generations. He is being charged with carrying weapons of maths instruction.

 

[Webbo2]

Why do Crocs have holes in them.
So you can watch your dignity drain out of them.

 

[lenfield]

I bought 2 litres of Tipex.
It was a big mistake.

 

[lenfield]

What do you call a married couple who go fishing together?
Rod and Annette.

 

[PeteXXX]

How do trees use the Internet?

They log in..

😁

 

[Ming the Merciless]

How did I get out of the Middle East?

I ran

 

[Gwylan]

Normally I wouldn't laugh at that but I've had two glasses of wine and three, possibly four, piña coladas and I'm in rather a good mood. 😂

Slow day in Glasgow then.

 

[glasgowcyclist]

Slow day in Glasgow then.

Mallorca, ackcherly.

 

[Moon bunny]

What do you get if you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

 

[postman]

Oh I am so upset,so emotional.My local garage is closing,I am filling up right now.

 

[Beebo]

 

[Beebo]

View attachment 808945

Just realised that is a 43 year old joke.
Not many children are going be get the reference.
It would be a bit like our dad’s referencing some pre war music hall stuff.

 

[ebikeerwidnes]

Just realised that is a 43 year old joke.
Not many children are going be get the reference.
It would be a bit like our dad’s referencing some pre war music hall stuff.

I got it

and I am not old

and me having a bus pass and getting the OAP is not relevant to this conversation!!