Mundane news: male Blackcap still filling its boots on sunflower hearts, small caterpillar seen through kitchen window twisting in the wind on a silken thread. There was a loud banging and crashing at the side of the house just after 10pm last night. Seems to be some afters following this incident. Two badgers, innocently mutual grooming at first, accompanied by extraordinary chittering noises.
Rapidly degenerated into attempted rape, or more likely assertion of dominance.
Followed by rapid pursuit down the garden and back again, which was when the bust up happened down the side of the house.