3rd time knocked down by a car. This is starting to get old

[DCLane]

<sigh>this is going to be a process</sigh>

I'm not giving up, but it's going to a hard road back.

A hard road it may be, but the journey gets easier.

Keep going

 

[raleighnut]

<sigh>this is going to be a process</sigh>

I headed out for a test ride, then got an invitation to coffee with @vickster which I readily accepted despite her complete failure to offer me any more gears. On the way, I stopped to understand why I couldn't clip in with my right foot, and it turned out that all the walking I did when borrowing the bike (I wore my SPDs but decided I was carrying too much to safely ride. Ironically one of the things I was carrying was a bag with a pannier rack) wore the cleat down so there was no lip at the front. That caused me a couple of scares when my foot slipped off, but I modified and slowed my riding to be safe again. I think it's probably the sad demise of my shoes, but with over 32,000km on them, I guess I can't complain. It's certainly not worth putting new cleats on these beat up old shoes.

The journey home was uneventful until <tl;dr? Start here> a couple of kilometres from home, a pensioner (I guess from her hairdo) in her 80/90s hatchback passed me dangerously closely. I picked up the pace to bang on her passenger door and shout at her (yeah, I know, don't lecture me please) but she caught the lights I didn't, so I let it go. I reached a partially light controlled roundabout that I know how to navigate, but found myself in the wrong lane with a car up my arse, so dismounted. I was shaking and on the verge of tears from the previous encounter.

I'm not giving up, but it's going to a hard road back.

 

[betty swollocks]

saccadic masking.
I wish you all the best.
IMO flying lumps of metal controlled by fallible humans should never be allowed on our roads and if I was dictator, I'd ban them.
If you have not already read it, may I suggest you read the linked article which explains why motorists sometimes genuinely don't see you, even when they have 'looked'.
It makes scary reading, but also makes you think about how, knowing the ways human vision works, you can amend your cycling style, to minimise dangers presented to you even more and thus ride with regained confidence.

 

[jefmcg]

Sorry for hijacking your thread with a discussion of weird roundabout cycle lanes @jefmcg Sorry I can't offer you a hug. I don't do hugging. But I'd offer you one of my pork pies if that were possible.

No problem with hijacking; I asked for this thread to be moved away from personal matters so people could discuss stuff like this.

And hugging? I'm a sometimes hugger, but a very reluctant huggee. i.e. I will (after acquiring proper consent) hug someone who seems to be in need, however I do not enjoy hugs - especially from strangers - when I am distressed.

Forum hugs are always welcome, of course.
[QUOTE 5271534, member: 10119"]What size feet have you got? I realise I don't know actually if you're munchkin or Goliath size... but I have a virtually unused pair of Lake (I think) shoes knocking about that I was very generously donated when I needed to go clipless for stoking purposes several years ago. They've done one Dun Run and one Random Tandem with me, plus one Rally Night Ride-ette and a FNRttC (and SMRback) with someone else. You'd be welcome to 'em if size 6 or 6.5 ( I'd have to find them to check) is any use.[/QUOTE]

Thanks for the offer, but I have to demure because

1. I have hobbit feet, so they won't fit.
2. I do have a spare pair, though from Aldi or Lidl, so they aren't going to last like the Shimano ones.

I'll take you up on that offer of a ride when I get my groove back.

 

[swansonj]

I so much want to find you and give you a big hug but have a virtual one instead.

...

And hugging? I'm a sometimes hugger, but a very reluctant huggee. i.e. I will (after acquiring proper consent) hug someone who seems to be in need, however I do not enjoy hugs - especially from strangers - when I am distressed.

Forum hugs are always welcome, of course.....

I so much want to find you and buy you a big drink but have a virtual hug instead.

 

[Alan O]

I'll take you up on that offer of a ride when I get my groove back.

I think I have a spare groove at the back of one of my drawers somewhere, and you're welcome to it if it would help

Or in other words, I wish there was something I could do to help you get back other than offering mere words - but that's all I have, so they'll have to do. I look forward to hearing when you're back in the saddle, but obviously only when you feel ready.

 

[cyberknight]

Actually it's not. There are so many cyclists now on the roads in London that at some junctions, cyclists out number car traffic by many. Over the years car drivers have become very cyclist aware. There is also the fact that a lot of traffic in London (Central mainly) is jammed up so that cycling is far quicker and easier then driving.

I have to agree. I have lived in Zone 1 (Pimlico) and Zone 2 (Stamford Hill) and cycled everywhere. On the whole drivers are cyclist aware as there are so many about (with perhaps the exception of cabbies who simply don't give a sh!t).

I routinely experience worse driving in the countryside, where drivers bomb along country roads that (in the case of locals because they know the road) with little or no consideration for more vulnerable road users.

That said, the only major accident I've had was in London... but I am more nervous around here than there.

Indeed i have never ridden in lots of traffic but i can see how if they are used to you then they could react to your presence better than the lottery of drivers play racing down country lanes i commute .

 

[cyberknight]

Chapter 2.

Car was a Prius mini cab driven by a (as it turned out) nice Somalian-British driver with a real arse hole of a passenger - older white British male, if it needs to be said.

Driver did not believe he was at fault, but I don't understand why. I called 999, but Friday night the Met is busy and I was stuck in a queue. Kudos that a voice quickly came on to ask if I was in danger, and when I said no, I was put back in the queue. Meanwhile the passenger has decided I'm hysterical (my angry screaming when I hit the bitumen may have been a factor there ), and starts mansplaining to me why the cops aren't needed, badgering me with repeated "what benefit do you think you will get from the police attending?" I had no intention of justifying myself to this stranger who was clearly annoyed that me being struck by a car was delaying his journey home. I may have said "Shut the fark up"

Anyway, he soon had his answer, if he was paying attention. The driver showed me his taxi ID and when I asked to see his licence, he refused! Lucky just then the police arrived! Which is odd, because I was still in the queue. Turns out he was on his way somewhere and stumbled upon the scene. Parliamentary protection I think, motorbike with a gun and all! He took our statements and they matched, to quote the officer "I had to go over parts of the highway code with him" to explain he was in the wrong. Police also talked to the passenger, who I subsequently saw angrily stomping from the scene in search of another ride home without ever enquiring about my well being.

Once the driver understood he was at fault, he became genuinely apologetic. I totally believe he didn't mean to hit me. He didn't explain what was going through his head and didn't ask. We all have brain farts. He seemed like a competent driver, and getting home would be be difficult, so after he passed a breath test, I accepted his insistent offer to drive me home. We had a lovely chat on the way home, once I finally convinced him to stop apologising.

So the police have the incident recorded, but I don't know what action they will take. But I can guess.

Only just seen this so a belated glad your physically ok and i hope you get your head around to the idea of cycling being a fun thing to do asap .Your lucky the plod were passing .Unless your hospitalized they are not that bothered as i found out when i was knocked off last year and it took about 4 days for them to bother coming around even though i went to the station to report it just as the police car zoomed out on an emergency so no one could take my details.

It has taken me about a year to get my mojo back enough to start riding descents and corners like i use to since my faceplant .It does come back and i hope you find yours too.

 

[HLaB]

Sorry to read this @jefmcg (well the first and last pages, I never read in between.

As you're finding out painfully some drivers can be prats and although you shouldn't have to can you adapt your riding to allow for them; perhaps forgetting about priority (some drivers often don't) and think about safety (some drivers often dont do that either )

 

[Reynard]

Ouch! Only just seen this, but sending good vibes from me and the furry girls. I know you don't want hugs, but maybe some feline headbutts and purrs might do the trick? Oh, and chocolate. Chocolate *always* helps.

 

[jefmcg]

I am not making progress at all. I fumble starting to ride, and I am having many near clipless moments, which I would put down to riding a strange bike, except that didn't happen when I first started. I seem to be getting less and less confident. I actually stopped to have a cry on Kingston Bridge, after finding a short an uneventful journey on very familiar roads extremely stressful. I can't handle a roundabout unless there are no cars in sight - I am walking across more of them than I cycle across, and I regard every car approaching a stop sign to my left a potential assailant. I even shouted "look out!" to an Addison Lee moped, even though it was clear he was going to stop where he should.

Every time I go out I am less confident.

 

[Crackle]

I have no idea how you should approach this, I can only recount my own coping strategy. Personally I need time to rationalize incidents like this and put them in perspective. If I was undergoing this, I'd simply lob my bike in a corner and forget all about it for a while until one day the yearning to get back on took me and the wisdom of time had tempered me. I cannot say what you should do but don't be hard on yourself about this.

 

[si_c]

Like @Crackle I can't offer anything other than my sympathies as I've not been in the same position and we all respond to trauma differently, so no response is wrong, you can't change how you feel.

Perhaps riding off-road somewhere would help build your confidence back up? You could then slowly reintroduce road riding, either at quieter hours or in small doses or both.

 

[Arjimlad]

I am not making progress at all. I fumble starting to ride, and I am having many near clipless moments, which I would put down to riding a strange bike, except that didn't happen when I first started. I seem to be getting less and less confident. I actually stopped to have a cry on Kingston Bridge, after finding a short an uneventful journey on very familiar roads extremely stressful. I can't handle a roundabout unless there are no cars in sight - I am walking across more of them than I cycle across, and I regard every car approaching a stop sign to my left a potential assailant. I even shouted "look out!" to an Addison Lee moped, even though it was clear he was going to stop where he should.

Every time I go out I am less confident.

"Hope you're feeling better soon" isn't enough to say here. Perhaps you need some therapy ? I can relate to your descent into "paranoia" though.

CBT ? Talking therapy ?

Perhaps someone more qualified to comment could come up with something. Well done for not giving up thus far !

 

[User10119]

I don't know that I can offer any 'useful' comment at all - but didn't want to just read and run, so to speak. I hope you get back to where you want to be; take the time you need and all that.