Any good jokes ... ?

[Threevok]

Officials were called to a local circus, when the half-eaten remains of a tightrope walker were found

Police are treating it as murder, although doctors claim it was part of a balanced diet

 

[Cavalol]

 

[Dave7]

Nope. Don’t get it.

I am glad you said that. Its not just me then.

 

[Threevok]

Problems with distance vision ?

Then look no further....

 

[swee'pea99]

I think it has to do with the German pronunciation of "west" as "vest", but I could be wrong.

I think you're right...

I wouldn't have got it without the hint either.

 

[Threevok]

That's OK - I thought you were all watching on plus 1

 

[Dave7]

How do you spot a blind man in a nudist colony?
Its not hard.

 

[Dayvo]

 

[LCpl Boiled Egg]

I still don’t get the Bruce Willis/Westlife joke.

It's OK. It didn't work and it wasn't funny, you'll be fine.

 

[bruce1530]

My pregnant sister’s a ventriloquist.

We’re all hoping she’ll have a gouncing gagy goy.

 

[Chris S]

I think it has to do with the German pronunciation of "west" as "vest", but I could be wrong.

What did the German policeman say to his chest?
You are under a vest.

(stolen from a Christmas cracker, circa 1970)

 

[Lullabelle]

 

[Lullabelle]

What did the German policeman say to his chest?
You are under a vest.

(stolen from a Christmas cracker, circa 1970)

And that is where it should have stayed

 

[Vapin' Joe]

Sleep is my drug......my bed is my dealer and the alarm clock is the police.

 

[morrisman]

My friend writes lyrics about sewing machines.
She's a singer songwriter