Any good jokes ... ?

[Cavalol]

What a load of nonsense that 'volume control' shampoo is. Bought some for the wife and I can still hear her.

 

[Nibor]

I’m getting totally fed up with people whinging about the prices of things. £1.25 for a Tea, £1.75 for a Coffee, £2 for a slice of cake and £2.50 for car parking, any more complaints I will honestly stop inviting people round to my house!

 

[Chris S]

Chris Eubank has just published a book on ethics. If it's a success then he'll write one on Kent as well.

 

[Vantage]

Mary Mary quite contrary, how does your garden grow.
I live in a flat you stupid t**t, how am I supposed to know.

 

[Dayvo]

I've just been sacked as the Boy Scouts leader
I wasn't prepared for that

Did someone dib dib dib dob dob dob you in?

 

[Threevok]

I bought tickets to a Westlife gig in Germany

It turned out to be Bruce Willis in a lift

 

[Cavalol]

Our firm played 2 games of 5-a-side against Jewson's.


We won 3-2 on aggregate.

 

[Cavalol]

I was reminiscing about my school days, and all of the Teachers that got me through.

Thinking about it, I was probably too young to be drinking whisky.

 

[betty swollocks]

 

[EltonFrog]

I bought tickets to a Westlife gig in Germany

It turned out to be Bruce Willis in a lift

Nope. Don’t get it.

 

[simon the viking]

Nope. Don’t get it.

I didnt want to appear thick so left it for someone else to ask...

 

[guitarpete247]

Nope. Don’t get it.

Googled everything linking Westlife to Bruce Willis and lifts.
I don' t get it either.

 

[simon the viking]

Googled everything linking Westlife to Bruce Willis and lifts.
I don' t get it either.

I didnt bother googling it..... I thought somebody would be along in a minute to explain it...

Apparently not.....

 

[The Crofted Crest]

I think it has to do with the German pronunciation of "west" as "vest", but I could be wrong.

 

[simon the viking]

Have you got any mouth organs in?

Sorry sold the last to a woman, this morning...

Oh... that must have been Our Monica