Any good jokes ... ?

[tony111]

 

[Cavalol]

A lumberjack walked into a magical forest and picked a tree to cut down. As he swung his axe the tree shouted "Wait, I'm a talking tree!"

The lumberjack replied "Yes, and you will dialogue."

 

[betty swollocks]

I'm lonely and would like to meet other people who understand Venn diagrams.

But we never mix in the same circles.

 

[Cavalol]

My Gran is so old she remembers wearing pinaone, pinatwo and pinathree dresses.

 

[Cavalol]

 

[Arjimlad]

It's a little known fact that Anne Boleyn had a younger brother called Tenpin

Didn't he invent cricket or something?

 

[Joey Shabadoo]

 

[swee'pea99]

View attachment 471141

Brings to mind this from the Guardian yesterday: "... only 37% of participants in China recognised Tank Man, compared with a global average of 49%."

 

[benb]

A lumberjack walked into a magical forest and picked a tree to cut down. As he swung his axe the tree shouted "Wait, I'm a talking tree!"

The lumberjack replied "Yes, and you will dialogue."

That is utterly appalling. Have a like.

 

[Dayvo]

 

[Cavalol]

Would anyone like to buy any cymbal shaped pillows?

£50 per cushion.

 

[postman]

British summer time.

 

[PaulB]

I'm a fan of the Bee Gees and I'm also keen on Chinese cookery.

Well you can tell by the way I use my wok.

 

[Cavalol]

Ladies and Gents...

That concludes our tour of the toilets.

 

[EltonFrog]

I’ve just been surfing the jokes thread and came across this.

NHS Direct, how can I help?"

"Yes, hi. What do I do with these suppository?"

"Take it out of the box, get some lubricant and push it up your ar*e."

"Alright alright. I just needed a bit of advice, keep your hair on you moody cow !"

I’m pissing myself laughing at this for some reason.