Any good jokes ... ?

Discussion in 'CycleChat Cafe' started by cisamcgu, 31 May 2011.

  1. Cavalol

    Cavalol Guru

    My boss at the stencil factory once asked me to make a template for work, so next morning I went to the her house and let her tyres down.
  2. Davos87

    Davos87 Über Member

    North Yorkshire
    Knock Knock.
    Who’s There?
    It’s Grandad.
    Quick... Stop the cremation.

    * Courtesy of Harry Hiil *
    Last edited: 9 Jun 2019
    Fnaar, Kempstonian, colly and 6 others like this.
  3. betty swollocks

    betty swollocks large member

    My granny doesn't like her newly-installed stairlift.

    It's driving her up the wall.
    Fnaar, Threevok, Oldbloke and 6 others like this.
  4. betty swollocks

    betty swollocks large member

    I’ve just dropped the radio on to my toes.

    It megahertz.
    Wixsteman, Dayvo, JtB and 7 others like this.
  5. Cavalol

    Cavalol Guru

    Mr Wogan once asked me if was true that Toyah Wilcox never sang on any of her records.
    It's a myth, Terry, I replied.
  6. Paulus

    Paulus Started young, and still going.

    I went to watch an Ariana Grande tribute act the other evening, Ariana Regular. I should of known it wasn't going to be that good.
  7. Chris S

    Chris S Veteran

    I think 'Westlife' is phonetically similar to how Germans pronounce 'vest' and 'lift'.

    Bruce Willis thought it was cool to wear a vest without a shirt. I don't know why, it didn't work for Rab C. Nesbitt.
  8. colly

    colly Re member eR

    I met Jeremy Corbyn today. I told him, "Do you know my dads studied you for years. "
    He replied, "Oh is he a fan of mine?"
    I said "No, he's a "gynaecologist
  9. Cavalol

    Cavalol Guru

    Threevok, slowwww, R25 and 9 others like this.
  10. Arjimlad

    Arjimlad Tights of Cydonia

    South Glos
    :laugh: Pas d'elles yeux Rhone que-nous !
  11. AndyRM

    AndyRM XOXO

    Whitley Bay
    Truly awful. I've sent it to all my friends.
  12. Cavalol

    Cavalol Guru

    In the garden this afternoon, I absentmindedly took a swig of weedkiller instead of my beer. My missus thought it was hilarious, but I didn’t see the fungicide.
    Fnaar, Threevok, Wixsteman and 5 others like this.
  13. T4tomo

    T4tomo Veteran

    I think you'll find the wok was between you and a hard plaice.
    NorthernDave likes this.
  14. Cavalol

    Cavalol Guru

    I find it hard to let certain school traditions go.

    Every time I see a brick in a river, I dive in to retrieve it whilst wearing pyjamas.
    Fnaar, Threevok, PK99 and 4 others like this.
  15. Cavalol

    Cavalol Guru

    It's really hard to get down from an elephant.

    Most people get it from a duck.
  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
    Dismiss Notice