Any good jokes ... ?

[lenfield]

 

[morrisman]

Historians based at the Kangaroos Pouch Pub in the deepest Australian Outback have discovered the name of the jolly Swagman in the song Waltzing Matilda, after much research, several pints of Victoria Bitter, and half a dozen pies, they made an annoucement that the Jolly Swagman was called Andrew, a spokesperson said it's pretty obvious really, the song goes
"Waltzing Matilda, Waltzing Matilda
You'll come a-Waltzing Matilda with me
Andy sang as he watched, as he waited while his billy boiled,
You'll come a-Waltzing Matilda with me"

Andy sang, Andy watched, Andy waited while his billy boiled

 

[Poacher]

My wife went to the Caribbean.
Jamaica?
No, it was her choice.

My wife went to Indonesia.
Djakarta?
No, she flew.

 

[Profpointy]

My wife went to Indonesia.
Djakarta?
No, she flew.

You beat me to it! Though it should really be "I took my wife..." for it to entirely make sense

 

[DRM]

On my stay at an American hotel, I broke the bathroom tap, I reported iI've broken the tap, and the manager said Faucet, no, I said, it just came off in my hand

 

[DRM]

Andy sang, Andy watched, Andy waited while his billy boiled

that's not the lyrics Banjo Patterson wrote

 

[tyred]

View attachment 802501

I know it probably cost more than I'm likely to earn in a lifetime, but I have to say that is the most ugly monstrosity I have ever seen. Beauty really is in the eye of the beholder.

 

[tyred]

 

[DRM]

I know it probably cost more than I'm likely to earn in a lifetime, but I have to say that is the most ugly monstrosity I have ever seen. Beauty really is in the eye of the beholder.

You're not alone it's hideous bling laden carp

 

[craigwend]