Right, listen to me, it's crap, it's gonna be crap and it will probably get crapper before it gets better. And of course it will get better, look at all the divorced people around you... They got through it and moved on.
BUT NOW I'M GONNA BE REALLY HARSH ... Because I think you need to hear this
GET A BACKBONE.
Your problem is that you have lost control and she is calling all the shots. This is why you feel so desperate.
She has moved into the spare room and you have to wait to tell the kids together? Er why? Let me guess... Her idea? Why do you have to tell them together when it is her decision... She can tell them. They are adults they will cope with the news, no matter how upsetting it is. This is just a plot by her to give herself time to sort herself out no doubt, and so she can sleep easier basically by making this look like its a mutual decision which clearly it is not. And now she asks you for a lift into town. What the actual f*k? Do you think that you do not have a right to be angry just because you have kids? They say that depression is just anger without enthusiasm and you know what... They are right. LET ALL HELL loose on her. Tell her to get the f*k out if she doesn't want to be there and stop being so God damn nice. Trust me in this, you will feel a whole lot better when you have stood your ground and she is not going to respect you for being nice, trust me. She has decided to leave, so pack her bags and put them on the doorstep for when she gets home... I'm sure her mate will let her stay.
Then on Monday morning , phone your boss and tell him you'll be late and you'll take it as holiday and get your ass to a solicitor (many do a free consultation). Knowledge is power. Find out where you stand financially before she does. YOU divorce HER not the other way round. And when the solicitor asks if there is any one else, tell him you think so, because as harsh as it is to face, this is probably the reality.
Stop taking her crap and you will still have a broken heart, yes, but you will at least have some self respect which, let me tell you, is worth a lot more. And in the HIGHLY likely scenario that you standing up to her reignites her interest in you, tell her to f*k off back to the stone from under which she crawled.
I'm sorry if this sounds harsh, but get angry, it's the best way to pick yourself up, trust me. Been there bought the t shirt and looking back I'd rather hold my head up high than beg someone to stay. Even more so it was when I finally stood up for myself that I started to feel like I'd get through it. When you start taking control you will feel more empowered.
