Exam bloopers 2015

[Brains]

This would probably be beyond them then:
Directions:
1. Read all directions before beginning.
2. Take out one sheet of lined paper.
3. Place it on your desk so that the holes are on the left side and the margin is at the top.
4. Skipping lines, number your paper 1-7
5. On the first line, write your name.
6. On the second line, write the name of the person sitting across from you.
7. On the sixth line, draw three stars using a blue crayon.
8. In the center of the paper, about 5 lines below line seven, draw a box.
9. Write the number of siblings you have to the right of the box.
10. Divide the box into four equal parts with a purple crayon.
11. Color the top right hand section of the box orange.
12. Draw a flower in the bottom left hand corner of the box.
13. Color the center of the flower red.
14. Turn your paper upside down.
15. Write out today's date using all capital letters.
16. Turn your paper right side up again.
17. On line three, draw a small picture of your favorite food.
18. Draw a circle around it.
19. Write the name of your first pet on line four.
20. Draw a star in each corner of your paper, using four different colors.
21. Underline two of the stars.
22. Turn your paper over.
23. Fold it in half lengthwise.
24. Fold it in half the other way.
25. Write your middle name on the outside.
26. Ignore directions one through twenty-five and enjoy watching everyone else do this activity wrong.

I have got to try that one!

 

[Piemaster]

I've seen different versions of it. Wouldn't be difficult to amuse yourself coming up with something similar to suit a particular group of students.

 

[vernon]

I've seen different versions of it. Wouldn't be difficult to amuse yourself coming up with something similar to suit a particular group of students.

Some of the variants have instructions demanding that the person
A) Stands up and say "I am the smartest person in the class"
B) Count down from ten aloud.
C) Whistle the first line of the National Anthem

What can be even more amusing is to get pupils to write a sequence of instructions for making a jam sandwich. Only a minority get it right and following some of the defective sequences to the letter leads to some pretty amazing permutations of how to get it wrong e.g. a jar of jam between two slices of bread.

Kids get very few chances to hone their transactional English skills and this penalises them when they are asked to write extended pieces of prose in exams that demand correctly sequenced events, actions, observations and reasonings.

 

[Mugshot]

Exam question in Science
Spell magnetism.

Half my class spelt it wrong

Is the answer i t ?

 

[Cubist]

Then again I had to get involved in a discussion in the office when two work colleagues were busy convincing each other Sherlock Holmes was a real person...

My favourite moment playing Trivial Pursuit was listening to a "team" of students debating the question "Who wrote the famous parenting book "Baby and Child Care"? Five on the team, and the debate went on for about ten minutes. It was clear one or two knew the answer, because the name "Spock" cropped up a number of times, but the doubt set in as to whether it was a pen name, or the author's real name. Confusion reigned, and a further debate around whether or not it was a trick question. Someone then showed their true colours and started wondering about whether it was Dr or Mr, but they eventually elected a spokesperson to give the team's final answer. "Leonard Nimoy".

 

[Piemaster]

Kids get very few chances to hone their transactional English skills and this penalises them when they are asked to write extended pieces of prose in exams that demand correctly sequenced events, actions, observations and reasonings.

Thats quite disappointing. I would have thought it an essential skill for report writing in many occupations, certainly is in my engineering field. Something I'd prefer to do a lot less often than I have to.

 

[Saluki]

I will hold my hand up about my Biology mock O level.

We had a question on VD and I wrote something about symptoms. I said that that gentiles become swollen and painful.

Apparently it was 'quote of the week' on the staff room notice board.