Got fired from my job today.

[Fnaar]

I used to write for "Honesty is the Best Policy" magazine, but as I frankly wasn't very good at my job, and consistently under-performed or wrote pure drivel, they quite rightly gave me my cards and got rid of me.

 

[tyred]

I used to be a train driver but my career derailed.

 

[Theseus]

I was a miner until we got shafted.

 

[threebikesmcginty]

I used to work for a turfing contractor but they told me to sod off

 

[tyred]

I used to be a road sweeper but I got the brush off.

 

[tyred]

I used to work for Microsoft but I suffered a fatal exception error.

 

[Fnaar]

*Round of applause to all, I never thought this thread would reach 26 pages*

I used to be a rent boy*, but I got the sac/got shafted


* (I didn't really... anyway, I'm not sure you can get a job as such)

 

[tyred]

I used to be a thief but I had to give it up after I fell of the back of a lorry.

 

[tyred]

I used to be a roofer but I got slated.

 

[Yellow Fang]

I used to be a cesspit inspector, but I was told last in, first out.

 

[Theseus]

*Round of applause to all, I never thought this thread would reach 26 pages*

Only 14 pages here! (20 posts/page)

I was a bouncer in a brothel, but that was f**king boring.

 

[tyred]

I used to work for Benson and Hedges but my career went up in smoke.

 

[Yellow Fang]

I used to be a mathematics teacher, but I was summarily dismissed.

 

[threebikesmcginty]

I used to write messages for Hallmark
You had to be quick and on time
But I was a bit to slow for them
And I could never make the words fit

 

[Yellow Fang]

I used to be a reporter, but I was subjected to summary dismissal.