Got fired from my job today.

[661-Pete]

I'm currently working as CycleChat's cloakroom attendant, but I'm being slowly smothered by all the coats left behind by forummers posting on the "Got fired from my job today" thread. Somebody help please!

 

[Yellow Fang]

I used to be a beautician, but I was fired for gross misconduct.

 

[Yellow Fang]

I used to be a high ranking policeman, but I was decommissioned.

 

[Yellow Fang]

I used to be a cardinal, but I was told my number was up.

 

[Yellow Fang]

I used to be a computer programmer, but my work was out sourced.

(computer programmers write source code)

 

[Yellow Fang]

I used to be a professional cyclist, but I was done for pedaling

 

[tyred]

I used to be a dentist but I got bored.

 

[tyred]

I used to work for a tailor but I got the needle.

 

[Yellow Fang]

I used to work as a courier, but they called in the receivers.

 

[slowmotion]

I worked for a lingerie company but they went bust.

 

[Yellow Fang]

I used to be an horologist, but I was fired for bad time-keeping.

 

[slowmotion]

I used to be a public executioner, but I was a victim of a head count.

...no you weren't! You were axed.

 

[Yellow Fang]

I used to sell turf for a living, but nobody liked my pitch.

 

[Yellow Fang]

I used to be a market trader, but my career just stalled.

 

[Yellow Fang]

I used to work for a firm of witch doctors, but the company decided to rationalize.