If I've ever inspired you, then its

[cyberknight]

My thoughts go with you and i am glad you had the cajones to sort your life out , my marriage is at best shaky and i only play ball because i love my kids enough to take the historyonics from my wife who has on occasions thrown wobblers and walked out for no reason leaving me with the kids etc etc .

 

[ColinJ]

Reiver, I know you meant '' get back in and get the evidence'' and that you weren't being callous.
Also I think it's a fair bet to assume that controlling and violent men are more common than a similar woman but I know personally of a young man who was stabbed (and died) by his girlfriend, just because he wanted to end the relationship. When the details came out it seems the main reason for him wanting to end it was that she was violent.
Women may in general be weaker than men but something like a knife makes no distinction.

Just ask John Wayne Bobbitt!

 

[subaqua]

[QUOTE 2100219, member: 9609"]I don't mean for one second apologise and mean it - just a ploy to get back into the house, from within the house you could build a better case. Nobody will ever get custody if they are homeless.

@colly - I also wouldn't suggest that to a woman when violence had been mentioned, but in general a woman is not going to do that much damage (obviously the OP's wife could be the exception), get a mini camera and get it on film, it would be worth a beating to get the house and kids.[/quote]

that was the attitude i got from Cheshire police when me , a 6ft + , 17st bloke made my first report. they said it wasn't possible for a woman to do that. i never fought back as
a) I was taught never to hit a woman
b) if i had then me being as big as i was , was looking at not being beleived it was in self defence and me ending up in prison.

its not a good place to be in .

 

[gb155]

I do have the proof on text and so does a relative too, there's no way I could go back, I have never met anyone on a social ride from here, despite being a lover of cycling and very social, ask yourselves why peeps, it's a dark place, tho it will get better

Gaz

 

[DCLane]

I do have the proof on text and so does a relative too, there's no way I could go back, I have never met anyone on a social ride from here, despite being a lover of cycling and very social, ask yourselves why peeps, it's a dark place, tho it will get better

Gaz

Simply put, it's about time you do then. And yes, it'll get better.

But for now, get yourself and your child sorted, with legal advice and somewhere to stay.

 

[Saluki]

Hi.
Sent a few quid over. We don't have a lot ourselves right now.

I was once in an abusive relationship and I left with my car and my dogs, I don't have children. Shelter were amazing, as were C.A.B.
As long as you can prove the abuse (I have no doubt that you can) the council can be very helpful, even if its temporary accommodation while you sort something more permanent.
Good luck with everything.

 

[Silver Fox]

Is this going to turn into a 'All women are bad thread' ?

No they're not, far from it, but unfortunately the greedy and vindictive ones don't do decent women any favours.

 

[Cyclist33]

[QUOTE 2099680, member: 9609"]not at all, he needs to get back into his home. buy a voice recorder, a mini camera, record what is going on and if she is being violent and abusive then she will be the one that needs to leave and he will keep his kids. to my mind he is massively disadvantaging himself by leaving - he isn't going to be able to hold onto one of his children with no roof over his head.[/quote]

That much is likely. How many courts will side with a homeless father over a mother with a roof over her head?

 

[Cyclist33]

Gaz, have been some of the way there, as my ex took my child away from me, I must point out I was not violent and abusive. No more than she at any rate. In some ways it was what I considered a normal relationship with its arguments and make ups. But anyway. I feel for you and it will get better some day, probably not for a while though.

Kids are the important thing. Have you got relatives you can stay with? Surely that makes most sense in the short term?

Stu

 

[gb155]

Simply put, it's about time you do then. And yes, it'll get better.

But for now, get yourself and your child sorted, with legal advice and somewhere to stay.

I agree, but having no bike doesn't really help

As you say, there's other stuff to sort first tho

Gaz

 

[Black Sheep]

I do have the proof on text and so does a relative too, there's no way I could go back, I have never met anyone on a social ride from here, despite being a lover of cycling and very social, ask yourselves why peeps, it's a dark place, tho it will get better

Gaz

I don't know if you've got your bikes with you, but I'm north manchester-ish with not a lot to do at the moment if you fancied a ride to take your mind off things for a bit, I'm also in and out of Manchester job hunting if you needed to meet up with someone to just have a normal chat about bikes, put the world to rights or anything else.

 

[gb155]

I don't know if you've got your bikes with you, but I'm north manchester-ish with not a lot to do at the moment if you fancied a ride to take your mind off things for a bit, I'm also in and out of Manchester job hunting if you needed to meet up with someone to just have a normal chat about bikes, put the world to rights or anything else.

I'd love to but sadly no bikes, it literally was leaving in what we were stood in

 

[gary in derby]

[QUOTE 2099610, member: 9609"]go back, apologize, get yourself back into the house, and when your feet are back under your own table start building your case then.[/quote]
Sorry Gaz, but need to borrow your thread for a minute. As have to take issue with Reivers comment.

Reiver, i appreciate where you are coming from. But, you have clearly no idea what it is like to be in that situation.
do you have any idea how it makes you feel?
well, i cant speak for Gaz. But i can tell you how i felt.
after several years of marrage and having everything thrown at me. Yes THROWN, for example kitchen knives, bricks well anything she could pick up. Also ending up in hospital with a smashed nose. two operations to fix it. knocked off garage roof and breaking back. yes it was wife that knocked me off. Again ended up in hospital to repair spine. spent 10 days in hospital that time and not one visit. i returned home to find out from neighbour she haqd been partying all the time i was in hospital. before you wonder, im 6 foot 3 and build like a brick s**thouse. So, still with staples in my back i walked out like Gaz, with nothing. exept zero self esteem, zero confidence and even left the medication given to me. this all happened in 2000. 12 years later and several suicide attempts. thankfully something im crap at. I am now in a loving relationship with a fantastic woman who has spent the last ten years trying to rebuild me. Still not there yet as still run for the hills every time someone raises their voice to me. But getting better.

Gaz, at he moment i am not in a position to help financialy. but have time to chat. I do know how it feels. But , please promise me you wont undo all the good work you have done in losing weight. i put on over 12 stone when it happened to me. and still trying to sort it out.

Best Wishes
Gary

 

[fossyant]

Anyway you could take a friend with you, possibly two, male and female, to collect your things ? I say two as it would be less threatening, two males won't be good, neither will you and a female as this Might be mis-read.

Hopefully you have found a place to stay, any relatives near by ?

 

[Silver Fox]

Anyway you could take a friend with you, possibly two, male and female, to collect your things ? I say two as it would be less threatening, two males won't be good, neither will you and a female as this Might be mis-read.

Hopefully you have found a place to stay, any relatives near by ?

Another option would be to ask the police to attend whilst you recovered your stuff. Their presence would be impartial and to prevent a breach of the peace.