Ping: fellow depressives

[Fab Foodie]

Omega 3 tabs are worth taking, look for the ones with the most DHA and EPA for your buck. There's no danger of OD'ing on fish oils!

 

[Norm]

I have derived considerable help and comfort from books, both books by depressed people (Spike Milligan being am obvious choice) and by those who deal with the depressed professionally, such as Dr Anthony Clare.

It was a shock to be diagnosed with depression, as I didn't see myself as that "type" and I got comfort both that I wasn't the only one and that there was no such thing as a "type" from books.

As for professionals, I got most help from a psychiatric social worker, or psw. Although it obviously depends on the individual and I'm not even sure such things as psw's still exist.

 

[Lisa21]

Possibly trying all sorts of different options is good, as what helps one person may not be of much use to another.
Personally im not sure I could do the talking to someone bit, not someone whom I didnt know anyway,but others may find it their best help.( although I did find talking to my horse helped a lot, plus he didnt interrupt, he just drooled carrot juice all over me )
I have found that lots of fresh fruit, vegetables, and fish, cutting out all the cr@p from my diet, no alchohol, and passionflower tincture seem to help if I keep this up for a few weeks and get out on my bike as much as is humanly possible. However, I might have to rethink all of the above as i need to go back to my vets docs due to a recent setback and he may suggest something else...

 

[661-Pete]

Just an update - had my first session with the shrink psychotherapist/counsellor, yesterday. Think there is some prospect of making something positive there, anyway have fixed up another appointment.

She wasn't at all sure about how much of it was D, but assured me there was Anxiety there and also Anger. And I seemed to have 'lost my purpose' or something like that. She noted something in the way I was breathing, apparently I'm to be set some breathing exercises! We didn't go too deeply into my personal life, but I spoke of things that have caused anxiety and loss of motivation over the years.

We touched on anger, and I showed her the stuff - off of another place - which I mentioned earlier. She said she gets a lot of this, it's a major part of her workload, bullying on FB and the like. The internet age! I said I want to handle my own reactions better. Anyway I'm supposed to do a private write-up, a sort of testimonial, saying my thoughts about all the stuff and how I'd like it to turn out. Which isn't how it will or ought to turn out of course.

 

[Angelfishsolo]

Your story could be my story.

When I am on my bike the world is a great place. Even the knowledge that I can ride my bike helps. When "it comes down" I remove myself from the world for a while. It works for me.

Nice to see these replies folks. I have to take anti-depressants (high dosage) and find it quite easy to talk about it, not only on line but face to face for those who need to know.

I think, as already said, you have to come to terms with it and to even admit to yourself that there is a problem is a huge challenge for most folk. I was so blind to the fact that I had a problem until one day when I had blown up again!!!! I gave myself a choice, loose everything I had, loved, cherished and up until that very point in time, lived for, or do something about it.

The "something about it" in my case was professional help and meds and since that time I have never looked back.

I am much happier and OK, my life will never be the same, but I lose myself in everything that gives me a high, be it family, our pets, music or the good old cycling. There is a lot to be said about the "healthy body/healthy mind" in my opinion

I've set my sights on time trialling in 2010, will I get there? Who knows, as I have arrived at stage in my life when what I can't do today, I do tomorrow

I have referred to the "problem" in this reply, it is only this if you let it be

Alan.

 

[661-Pete]

Another update, another thread 'bump'...

Had three sessions with the shrink now. Will probably wrap it up with a fourth, mid-April, then call it a day. After all, it costs a bomb! Whether these sessions in themselves are taking me anywhere, I don't know - I kind of wonder, I look at her approach, her mannerisms, I get to thinking I can do it on my own... Hope this doesn't come across as rude.

Have I achieved something? I'm finding I'm able to work more steadily at my - well, work - without lapsing into a sort of mental torpor after only a few tens of minutes. That must count for something.

Going to France end of next week, I shall know things are looking up a bit if I manage to set up the telescope and use it. Not having had the motivation to do that, has hurt.

As for the anger thingy, yes we talked a fair bit about that. I'm to try two different approaches towards easing off the stuff going around in my head, but I'm not supposed to go public on exactly what, not for now. But this stuff is easing off of its own accord, anyway. Time is the healer. I've even edited a post I made earlier in this thread, the angry stuff I put down then, is not what's in my mind to say, now. We shall see.

I know I've had to be particularly vague in this post, but if anyone can glean anything of use to them from it, well and good. All I can say is, the 'D' is less than it was...

 

[Dayvo]

Another update, another thread 'bump'...

All I can say is, the 'D' is less than it was...

Glad to hear that things are slowly working for you, Pete!

It is a long road, but you'll reach the summit sooner, rather than later.

Good luck and start posting some of your fantastic space images again.

 

[ttcycle]

Pete- missed these threads- I'm glad to hear that there have been some shifts for you and I hope that this is the start of something positive for you.

As for me - struggling quite a lot at the moment - can feel up and down but for me I hope and deep down know that it won't be like this forever this might not be visible to me during the darkest or most anxious days but it's there.

 

[Vikeonabike]

After searching the forum and finding this, and after some thought, I've decided to add to and 'bump' the thread.

Just been started on Citalopram (20mg). Not finding it easy. Don't want to say too much at present.

Just got back from the docs with my prescription for Citaolopram.....

The last few weeks have been a bit of a nightmare as I have finally admitted to myself that I have a problem....
Low Self esteem, low Self Confidence, lack of energy/ interest in anything.. and a few other things thrown in....(Which is a bit rich from someone who thought low self confidence meant thinkng somebody else was as good as me). Any way the doc has diagnosed depression...which is what Mrs Vike said too.
My first thought was ....don't be sodding stupid..what have I got to be depressed about...I have a good job (which I love doing), a great family, no major money worries and a roof over my head..It would appear, simplifying things that my brain is jst wired up wrong...Oh great I'm a menalist! This just gets better and better. So how am I going to cope, probably by talking too friends...taking the mickey out of myself and a bit of PMA....oh yeah and pills, don't like that idea but hey (they're supposedly not addictive), in for a penny in for a pound...
I've read what people say about diet so I'll look into that as well...
Wonder if Mrs Vike will be gullible enough to give me £1000 to spend on anew bike because that will obvioulsly help!

Anyway...early days for me...fingers crossed things get better, not worse for all of us.
Vike

 

[Norm]

My first thought was ....don't be sodding stupid..what have I got to be depressed about...

IMO, the single worst thing about helping non-sufferers to understand depression is that depression does not mean being depressed.

Being depressed is, for me, a short term feeling brought about from opening the post, listening to the news, waking up on Monday morning etc.

Depression is a long term mental health issue.

There is no equivalence, one does not lead to the other in either direction in that non-depressed people can get pissed off and depressed people can make great company for an evening.

There are as many causes of depression as there are sufferers and many of those sufferers just have a chemical imbalance which drugs can help resolve.

 

[pubrunner]

Time is the healer.

Hi Pete,

Interesting reading; I think that to some degree, many people within & without this forum will be able to 'relate' to your postings . . . . . . . if they're honest about it !

I was surprised to read this :

It was a shock to be diagnosed with depression, as I didn't see myself as that "type" and I got comfort both that I wasn't the only one and that there was no such thing as a "type" from books.

From what I've read on this forum, I consider Norm to be a highly intelligent fellow; his postings are always witty, pertinent and relevant. Furthermore, he rarely (if ever) seems to offend others - quite a skill, that !

I don't see Norm as that 'type' either; but as Norm goes on to mention, there is no such thing as a 'type'.

In my opinion, you've already made a positive step, merely by voicing (and sharing) your feelings on this (public) forum.

Please be aware that you have considerable 'support' on this forum; furthermore, many of us like to read your postings - you are appreciated !!

Please read the previous sentence again . . . . . . . and then one more time.

Don't 'over-analyse' things - a common 'mistake' in my view.

Over the years, I have met people from all walks of life - only natural in a pub. I've been insulted, physically attacked, abused & ignored. I've had people try to 'con' me, steal from me and tell lies about me. In the distant past, I used to (partially) blame myself for the way that others treated me; an attempt, if you will, to 'excuse' their behaviour. I used to frequently consider how various scenarios might have finished, if I'd followed an alternative course of action.

I wasted a lot of time and energy, on 'over-analysing' things, when I should have been focussing on positive experiences.

In the early days, we used to get some appalling snobs in the pub; because of my (relative) youth, inexperience and lack of confidence, I was uncertain of how to deal with such patronising & bullying behaviour. I was too anxious to please the customers.

Many years on, I know how to deal with customers. I know that a Landlord is 'there to be shot at' but that does not excuse rude & unpleasant behaviour. I now focus on the many happy customers and what we have achieved.

Just as in a pub, I know that there are a few on this forum who will 'bully' if given a chance; I know that they couldn't run a pub anything like as well as I do - however 'clever' they are. I've learned to focus on the positives and (largely) ignore the negatives. Yes, I do lack confidence regarding issues of a 'practical' nature - such as fixing my bike - but only 'cos I usually end up breaking something.

Take pride in what you know and can do well, you possibly take certain things for granted . . . . . . .

start posting some of your fantastic space images again.

I wasn't aware that you own a telescope, frankly, I'm not even certain I could find the North Star.

I'll end by saying "Don't be hard on yourself" - give yourself a bit of leeway.

Oh yes, drink ain't the answer . . . . . . . especially if you ain't buying in my pub !

 

[Fletch456]

We touched on anger, and I showed her the stuff - off of another place - which I mentioned earlier. She said she gets a lot of this, it's a major part of her workload, bullying on FB and the like. The internet age! I said I want to handle my own reactions better. Anyway I'm supposed to do a private write-up, a sort of testimonial, saying my thoughts about all the stuff and how I'd like it to turn out. Which isn't how it will or ought to turn out of course.

Did they mention CBT? Wanting to change your own reactions better is right up the CBT street. Apologies if telling you something you know - it's commonly used amongst therapists in dealing with depression and is recognised for delivering results quickly - in the short to medium term. Longer term requires other things.

Two books on it I recommend are Brilliant Cognitive Behavioural Therapy by Dr Stephen Briers and Mind Over Mood: Change How You Feel By Changing the Way You Think by Christine Padesky and Dennis Greenberger. The former is presented well with useful exercises and the latter is commonly recommended by therapists - if you are taught CBT by a therapist you may well be recommended this one. Both are on Amazon.

Courtesy of BUPA I had the privilege of £20k worth of therapy - though a lot of that cost is because I was an in-patient at one of the Priory hospitals - so feel I can speak with some authority. My therapist and shrink - both of whom I no longer see - kindly halved their fees when the BUPA money ran out. I also read reasonably widely and though it wasn't the deepest of depressions I've certainly recovered well.

Two other books worth looking at for different reasons are: Depressive illness-curse of the strong Dr Tim Cantopher - also includes useful section for family and friends; The Depression Cure: The Six-Step Programme to Beat Depression Without Drugs by Dr Steve Ilardi.

A review of the second of those is here - http://www.guardian....n-without-drugs. He is an American clinical psychologist and I agree with his thinking, like his logic. Like someone else mentioned in this topic - Omega 3 oils - he tells you about the molecular length and good reasons for taking what sound like large doses. The only place I have found stocking them to get what he says you need is Zipvit. I also like his style - he is easy to read - and common sense - some of the things that can make a difference for example are an active social life; 8 hours sleep; 45 mins exercise a week. I didn't expect just 6 things that he recommends to last a whole book but they do without feeling boring and monotonous.

Perhaps most importantly you're concentration probably isn't what it could be right now so if you feel inclined to read something great - don't feel you have to read a whole book if any of those I've suggested. Do what you feel is comfortable, what you feel is doable without causing any strain. Recovering from depression is analogous to going to the gym after an injury - you would be very careful to not over do it, taking small steps as you wouldn't want to do any harm and progress slowly but surely. So it is with depression - take it very easy - baby steps. It is very important to be patient with oneself.

Someone in this topic said that depression cannot be cured - that is wrong. There is no magic pill, no silver bullet and much of the cure is up to you - you have to put the work in - but it is very curable and at least two psychiatrists I know of (I don't know any others - thankfully) would also tell you it can certainly be got rid of.

 

[Fletch456]

IMO, the single worst thing about helping non-sufferers to understand depression is that depression does not mean being depressed.

Being depressed is, for me, a short term feeling brought about from opening the post, listening to the news, waking up on Monday morning etc.

Depression is a long term mental health issue.

There is no equivalence, one does not lead to the other in either direction in that non-depressed people can get pissed off and depressed people can make great company for an evening.

There are as many causes of depression as there are sufferers and many of those sufferers just have a chemical imbalance which drugs can help resolve.

Well said and worth saying. (though after long comment I just put on I feel I am at risk of sounding like I may come across as being on a rant like soap box and boorish)..anyway..well said I thought.

 

[Fletch456]

Have I achieved something? I'm finding I'm able to work more steadily at my - well, work - without lapsing into a sort of mental torpor after only a few tens of minutes. That must count for something.

As for the anger thingy, yes we talked a fair bit about that. I'm to try two different approaches towards easing off the stuff going around in my head, but I'm not supposed to go public on exactly what, not for now. But this stuff is easing off of its own accord, anyway. Time is the healer. I've even edited a post I made earlier in this thread, the angry stuff I put down then, is not what's in my mind to say, now. We shall see.

Just read the later post Pete - I think I read an earlier one that I replied to. Anyway, you've definitely achieved something. It sounds like your counsellor is of the semi interactive type - I don't know how to better categorise them - and the more interactive the better I found; otherwise you wonder if it's worth spending your money.

Re stuff round your head have you tried yoga or meditation? Meditation helps a lot..even just a simple breathing exercise. If you want to pm me I'll happily sent you a copy of a CD that's got a really good meditation exercise on it; otherwise there are some you can find on youtube.

 

[The Jogger]

How can you tell the difference from being thoroughly pissed off and depressed? I'm certainly a bit pissed off lately.