Right, come the revolution...

[feckless]

I don't think you've thought this through - the whole place would be littered with aristos saying 'Fark Orff' in very loud voices and shouting self-made Cockney millionaires.

Sounds just like a normal working day in the City to me.

f

 

[Elmer Fudd]

Oh and if I let you have a revolution can I just add that Rapha wearers, fixie fashionistas, wannabe couriers and anyone riding a Condor will have their bike replaced with a 70s shopper and their kit replaced by a drip dry, zip-up-the-back nylon old lady dress. With fur lined bootees.

Now, where's that sloth? ​

Have you made a mess ? Why do you keep asking for a cloth ??

 

[Carwash]

Facilitators would be responsible for policing the police, the government and the populace. Used sparingly, certain criminals could be made to dissappear...

My only rider is a cool black uniform with subtle red flashes, and access to motorbikes.

...and everyone would have a lifeclock embedded in their hands and would have to go to carousel when they reached thirty, and there'd be Michael York in a jumpsuit, and...

 

[Arch]

All non native cats to be exterminated.

If you can explain what you mean by non-native... the question of whether British domestic cats are descended from native wild cats, or from imported domestics from the continent is one question that continues to exercise experts to this day...

I'm liking most of the ideas so far. Not convinced about the tax on tea issue, being a tea drinker. Jacomus may certainly be made responsible for law-n-order...

Speicher, a small teddy sweater is on my mental list. I suppose I have to think of a revolution logo now...

 

[papercorn2000]

If you can explain what you mean by non-native... the question of whether British domestic cats are descended from native wild cats, or from imported domestics from the continent is one question that continues to exercise experts to this day...

I'm liking most of the ideas so far. Not convinced about the tax on tea issue, being a tea drinker. Jacomus may certainly be made responsible for law-n-order...

Speicher, a small teddy sweater is on my mental list. I suppose I have to think of a revolution logo now...

I think you may find that I have first dibs on that one!

 

[papercorn2000]

...and everyone would have a lifeclock embedded in their hands and would have to go to carousel when they reached thirty, and there'd be Michael York in a jumpsuit, and...

Would we have a (mid-70's vintage) Jenny Agutter teasing us with that brief glimpse over and over again?

 

[Arch]

I think you may find that I have first dibs on that one!

Ah. Um. Can you work together? Or one of you can be MI5 and one MI6 or something like that...

 

[papercorn2000]

OK, I'll take the Justice Department.

 

[Stick on a Giant]

How about mobile phones and Ipods that explode when used in the 'quiet carriage' on the train? And other carriages as well.

Legalise guided missiles for use against chavmobiles with loud stereos, 4x4s in cities, 4x4s that are just offroad to churn up bridleways, and jetskis because they are irritating as f***.

 

[Arch]

How about mobile phones and Ipods that explode when used in the 'quiet carriage' on the train?

Only if they explode quietly... I take it you mean if the noise of the ipod is audible to anyone other than the wearer, as well. I'd use my MP3 player in a quiet coach, just not loudly enough to be heard by anyone but me...

 

[Carwash]

Only if they explode quietly... I take it you mean if the noise of the ipod is audible to anyone other than the wearer, as well. I'd use my MP3 player in a quiet coach, just not loudly enough to be heard by anyone but me...

Perhaps this should be generalised to 'personal stereos that demonstrably aren't'. (personal, I mean, not stereo)

 

[Stick on a Giant]

Sorry Arch, but just using one in a quiet coach should be enough to trigger the (quiet) explosion, using one loud enough for others to hear in other coaches would also be sanctioned.

Carwash - agree, 'personal stereo' seems to be something of an oxymoron in practice.

 

[Arch]

Sorry Arch, but just using one in a quiet coach should be enough to trigger the (quiet) explosion,

But why? If you can't hear it, why does it matter whether I'm sitting there with earpieces in my ears or not? It's the quiet coach so that people don't have to be subjected to other people's music and phone chat, not so that they have to sit in silence themselves... Is quiet conversation between friends banned in quiet coaches?

 

[Twenty Inch]

If you can explain what you mean by non-native... the question of whether British domestic cats are descended from native wild cats, or from imported domestics from the continent is one question that continues to exercise experts to this day...

We'll kill them all. God will know his own.

 

[Twenty Inch]

Whenever I hear the word "Jetski", I reach for my Barrat Light .50 sniper rifle and load it with armour-piercing rounds.

In my milder fantasies.