I have it Gaz. I can't eat certain textures. pasta for instance, or anything squidgy or rubbery (for instance, there is no way i would put octopus or squid in my mouth just to even try it). If i don't like the colour, no way am i eating it, and if i don't like the smell, no way either.
My mum said the minute she put me on solids i would gag. the health visitor agreed with my mum that as the only thing i liked was banana's, that was fine to just feed me that, as they are full of nutrition. But the problem didn't just go away like they hoped.
I class myself as a "reluctant anorexic". My childhood years were a nightmare. memories of avoiding being invited to any friends house, hiding food at my own table (this including things like putting a bag in my pocket so i could sneak the food in, feeding the dog under the table, and i even learned that if you mash your food up, and push it to the edges of your plate, leaving a gap in the middle, my mum thought i had at least had "some" and she would let me leave the table. I dreaded been sat next to my dad at the table because he was more savvy. Sometimes though, out of desperation, my mum would make me sit there for about 2 hours after everyone else had finished to try and get me to eat.
Needless to say, it didn't work because I wasn't just being stubborn. Anytime i put anything near my mouth i would literally gag (even before it was in my mouth). Because of this i hated my childhood.
I've always been naturally skinny too, (when i hit 5ft 8inch i was only 6 stone and only 1/2 stone heavier when i reached 5ft 10inch!) so that didn't help and people actually did think i was anorexic, but i would eat loads of the stuff i did like (even though that was limited to a few foods) so eventrually my mum stopped worrying, not least because i've always been the healthiest of all my siblings. i'd never have a cough or cold and even now i'm hardly ever ill. I can ride miles on nothing too. LOL
i'm a bit better now, than i was, but it didn't start to get better until my 30's, when I think i discovered that mayonnaise didn't taste like what i thought it would taste like (accidently bought it in a sandwich). And since then, i have been a little braver in trying things. i mean, i still wouldn't try squid or anything because i know that would definitely make me gag... but i do now like spaghetti bolognaise (spelling?) as long as it's got lots of sauce on it (i gagged at a friends recently because she didn't put enough on!! hope she didn't notice, i made an excuse after i was full coz i couldn't face eating the rest), and pepperoni on pizza is nice too LOL. I've also discovered i like any vegetable if it is roasted, before that i was limited to peas.
People don't realise how food can affect your life. A really nice guy took me to dinner recently to a posh restaurant and i can't tell you what a relief it was to find steak and chips on the menu! I didn't want to offend the guy by gagging over my food! It's very embarrassing. i can't stand indian, thai, chinese, or anything like that, so i can't go to those places with friends. Maybe it's why i'm single?
i still can't eat some meats. steak has to be well cooked and has to be cut up small. pork is a no no, it just goes white and hard in my mouth, almost like i haven't got the enzymes to break it down, and i end up gagging on it. chicken and turkey is fine though. also lamb is nice but it's because it's tender
I think i could handle it better if i could control the gagging, but i can't. And don't even get me started on "I'm a celebrity" when they do the eating the bugs thing. i can't even stay in the same room, or even be able to hear what's going on, because it actually makes me throw up... way beyong gagging!
i thought i was a fussy eater. turns out i have a disorder!!! nice one! now i can say "i can't eat that, i have a disorder" Yay!
. After a lifetime of trying to beat this on my own I'm now going to Overeaters' Anonymous to try a different approach.
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