The bright idea thread

[glasgowcyclist]

Close all prisons and reopen them as homeless shelters. Resolve all criminal law cases with a large circus cannon situated on the cliffs of Dover.

That's a bit extreme isn't it? Think of the expense of gunpowder, not to mention the racket.
I suggest you replace the cannon with a trebuchet (mostly because I like saying the word).

 

[Tin Pot]

Solve all time travel discussion by discarding the notion of backwards or forwards in time and replacing it with the concept of all events happening within the now. Visualise this as similar to the static on an old TV screen.

 

[Tin Pot]

That's a bit extreme isn't it? Think of the expense of gunpowder, not to mention the racket.
I suggest you replace the cannon with a trebuchet (mostly because I like saying the word).

Load up, we have our first lucky winner.

 

[Tin Pot]

Oh, and all the stars in the sky up there are in fact just our Sun seen through a variety of looping wormholes in spacetime.

No problem being solved, except galactic vertigo I suppose.

 

[Tin Pot]

The size of bones in the fossil record are massively distorted by the fossilisation process. T Rex was in reality the size of a small chicken, but still had a vicious nip.

Solved dinosaur/bird debate because there were no dinosaurs...just birds.

 

[glasgowcyclist]

Load up, we have our first lucky winner.

Oh boy! I'm excited & nervous at the same time. Will you hold my hand?

 

[derrick]

That's not the attitude. We could set the World to rights here, and perhaps have a laugh along the .

Will not put the world to rights, but i feel some laughs coming this way.

 

[derrick]

What about putting winners in our England football team, instead of always playing our losers.

 

[Joey Shabadoo]

Looser whats? Shorts?

 

[classic33]

Load up, we have our first lucky winner.

It could be air powered.

 

[Profpointy]

Wait until Bob a Job week to get your house painted.
That’ll save £thousands

A bloke got the scouts to paint his porch on bob a job week. A knock on the door and scout says "we've finished, but it wasn't a porch, it was a mercedes"

 

[postman]

Re-invent the time machine

What a brilliant idea.Set it up for about twenty mins in to the second half of that match and move the ball forward towards the Croatian goal.

 

[Andy in Germany]

A bloke got the scouts to paint his porch on bob a job week. A knock on the door and scout says "we've finished, but it wasn't a porch, it was a mercedes"

The bummer with this joke is that it doesn't work in German because we pronounce the 'e' at the end of 'Porsche', which ruins everything...

 

[Salty seadog]

The size of bones in the fossil record are massively distorted by the fossilisation process. T Rex was in reality the size of a small chicken, but still had a vicious nip.

Solved dinosaur/bird debate because there were no dinosaurs...just birds.

We could easily establish the veracity of this claim..........









































.........reinvent the time machine, I cannot believe I'm the first to think of that one.

 

[Profpointy]

The bummer with this joke is that it doesn't work in German because we pronounce the 'e' at the end of 'Porsche', which ruins everything...

To paraphrase the Audi slogan "it is vank as ve say in Germany"