Things you'd like to say, but can't

[ColinJ]

Well, that's what comes of relying on 'Diet Ultra Energy Drink, Zero Calories' to fuel your busy day ... When I saw the label on the tin, I thought it was a bit odd - no calories, energy drink ... an interesting challenge to the First Law of Thermodynamics!

Anyway, that would explain why you had absolutely no choice but to do what you did. The free car park was full so you had to improvise to prevent having to walk an extra couple of hundred metres from a legal alternative. The busy footpath between the bus station and the river looked just big enough to squeeze the car onto, didn't it?

Congratulations, sir - there is nothing wrong with your spatial awareness - you got it in there with only cms to spare!

 

[Threevok]

Well, that's what comes of relying on 'Diet Ultra Energy Drink, Zero Calories' to fuel your busy day ... When I saw the label on the tin, I thought it was a bit odd - no calories, energy drink ... an interesting challenge to the First Law of Thermodynamics!

Anyway, that would explain why you had absolutely no choice but to do what you did. The free car park was full so you had to improvise to prevent having to walk an extra couple of hundred metres from a legal alternative. The busy footpath between the bus station and the river looked just big enough to squeeze the car onto, didn't it?

Congratulations, sir - there is nothing wrong with your spatial awareness - you got it in there with only cms to spare!

View attachment 422155

What a muppet.

If I was there - I would walk over it, to get where I was going.

The front is a nice shape to get a MTB over also

 

[Lullabelle]

FFS please get your paperwork sorted, I am waiting for 3 months worth. You finish next Friday for your2 week holiday, when you get back it will be 4 months worth! Then you will be far too busy to sort it which will then take it to 5 months I am fed up with this sitting on my desk waiting for you to sort yourself out. When you need something I have to do it straight away so why can't you get your act together

 

[Salad Dodger]

For fecks sake, how many times do we have to discuss the playlist for the concert in two weeks time?
Two weeks ago, we agreed the playlist.
Last week you lot changed it out of all recognition.
And today I had to sit through another hour of the chaos and confusion that passes for a discussion, during which it all got changed again.
We haven't practiced any of the songs yet, and we are on stage on Friday week, with only one possible practice get together before the gig. And at that meeting, you will probably change the fecking playlist again!!!!!

And breathe............

 

[TVC]

The people bailing out are the ones who left the last place in the great migration because it went to poo.

 

[Profpointy]

For fecks sake, how many times do we have to discuss the playlist for the concert in two weeks time?
Two weeks ago, we agreed the playlist.
Last week you lot changed it out of all recognition.
And today I had to sit through another hour of the chaos and confusion that passes for a discussion, during which it all got changed again.
We haven't practiced any of the songs yet, and we are on stage on Friday week, with only one possible practice get together before the gig. And at that meeting, you will probably change the fecking playlist again!!!!!

And breathe............

Can't you just sight-read whatever is put on the music stand on the night ?

 

[Salad Dodger]

Can't you just sight-read whatever is put on the music stand on the night ?

You might hope so, but it doesn't work that way for the band. It would be easier to negotiate Brexit than to find a key that everyone can agree to play in and sing in. It reminds me why I generally play and sing solo!

 

[Profpointy]

You might hope so, but it doesn't work that way for the band. It would be easier to negotiate Brexit than to find a key that everyone can agree to play in and sing in. It reminds me why I generally play and sing solo!

Surely the key signature is written on the first line of the music ?

(I am teasing as I was rubbish at sight-reading, and even when I'd practiced it I still needed the music)

 

[Threevok]

How do you expect me to buy a sofa from you, when you continuously present me with the disgusting view up Owen Wilson's nostrils, every tea time ?

 

[Andy in Germany]

How do you expect me to buy a sofa from you, when you continuously present me with the disgusting view up Owen Wilson's nostrils, every tea time ?

That could rank as one of the most surreal comments that has ever not been said...

 

[SteveF]

The Indispensable Man

(by Saxon White Kessinger)

Sometime when you're feeling important;
Sometime when your ego 's in bloom;
Sometime when you take it for granted,
You're the best qualified in the room:
Sometime when you feel that your going,
Would leave an unfillable hole,
Just follow these simple instructions,
And see how they humble your soul.

Take a bucket and fill it with water,
Put your hand in it up to the wrist,
Pull it out and the hole that's remaining,
Is a measure of how much you'll be missed.
You can splash all you wish when you enter,
You may stir up the water galore,
But stop, and you'll find that in no time,
It looks quite the same as before.

The moral of this quaint example,
Is to do just the best that you can,
Be proud of yourself but remember,
There's no indispensable man.

 

[jefmcg]

"don't let the door hit you where the good lord split you" would be pithier and less pretentious.

 

[Maverick Goose]

[QUOTE 5325994, member: 259"]You are about to go back to the UK and live in the little stone cottage in the Cotswolds that you bought during your successful career in banking, which was considerably eased by the fact you could move from one EU country to another for jobs without visas etc, but now you've given me a twenty minute lecture on how great Brexit is.

"Come on round if ever you're in the area!"

I hope I never see you again you pathetic excuse for a twat.[/QUOTE]
I've met so many people like that, who also invariably complain about how there are too many immigrants in the UK...

 

[Mugshot]

where the good lord split you" would be pithier and less pretentious.

"In the arse" even less so.

 

[Ming the Merciless]

What a nice temperature it is today