What's the stupidest thing you've heard about bikes - by someone who should really know better?

[Blue Hills]

In my teenage years, the classic was for bystanders to call out to passing cyclists "Hey! Your wheels are going round!"

as is this thread.

 

[Eric Olthwaite]

as is this thread.

I can't be expected to read everything!

 

[Blue Hills]

I can't be expected to read everything!

no probs - I have a habit of diving in part way through.

 

[Ming the Merciless]

That recumbent is dangerous, it so close to the road, drivers won’t be able to see it. This dumb statement is often expressed by other cyclists who should know better .

 

[mustang1]

That's nothing.

I went into a bike shop on holiday a few years ago, saw a track pump I liked, guy tells me the price. So I go back to our apartment for the cash and when I return he had doubled the price!

That's inflation, he told me 🤷‍♂️

He really pumped up the price huh.

 

[Profpointy]

so you can sharpen razor blades under that little cardboard pyramid ? why not store your bike under a bigger one? "Wow man you may be into something there".

The razor blade thing does work ... about half the time at any rate.

(I leave figuring out why as an excercise for the reader)

 

[thatguyfromebay]

That recumbent is dangerous, it so close to the road, drivers won’t be able to see it. This dumb statement is often expressed by other cyclists who should know better .

I mean, that's assuming drivers are able to see a cyclist to begin with!

 

[mustang1]

An old one that some may not have heard:

An Oxford professor was seen pumping up the front tyre on his bike when clearly the rear tyre was deflated. A passing undergraduate asked him why he was doing this and got the reply: 'Do you mean to say that they are not interconnected?'

This reminds me of my neighbour. I had to goto the local shop and walked out the door when I saw my neighbour (Hello John!) pumping his bike tyre. About 30 minutes later I walked back and he was still pumping the bike tyre: same bike, same tyre. I put the shopping down and "Hey John, you want some help?"

"The air isn't going into the tyre no matter how much i pump it" he told me.
I went over, closed the lever on the tyre pump and instantly he felt some resistance and said "ah now I can feel the air go in, i never knew you had to close that thing!"

 

[thatguyfromebay]

This reminds me of my neighbour. I had to goto the local shop and walked out the door when I saw my neighbour (Hello John!) pumping his bike tyre. About 30 minutes later I walked back and he was still pumping the bike tyre: same bike, same tyre. I put the shopping down and "Hey John, you want some help?"

"The air isn't going into the tyre no matter how much i pump it" he told me.
I went over, closed the lever on the tyre pump and instantly he felt some resistance and said "ah now I can feel the air go in, i never knew you had to close that thing!"

Two words: Presta valve. (Most tubes I have are Schraders)

 

[mustang1]

"What are you up to this weekend?" my friend asked me.
"I've been wanting to do a century ride for a while so I think I'll do that if I can be bothered to wake up early enough" I replied.
"What's that?"
"You gotta ride a 100 miles or a 100km, I'm doing the miles."
"Wow? Really? OMG. So how long will that take, like 7 or 8 days?"
"Uhm, no, just one day, maybe 7 or 8 hours coz I'm unfit."
The guy nearly fainted. "WHAT? I don't even drive a hundred miles in my car nad you're doing it on a bike, in ONE DAY???"

The funny thing is he is also a cyclist so I figured it's not a big deal for him.

 

[ColinJ]

With a rider of my weight, with my quads that pretty close to the truth. Im very pleased indeed if a chain is inside 0.75 after 1200 or so miles (not those diet km things the foreigners use).

That reminds me of someone whose chain only lasted about 12 or so miles...

Ha - I took a young bodybuilder colleague out on a hilly ride once and he DID manage to damage his transmission. He insisted on using the big ring everywhere, including a 25% climb! I told him to use lower gears and spin his legs but he stuck to using masses of brute force. After a couple of hills he ripped the chain apart ...

 

[byegad]

I've had a 'Roadie' pull alongside me on my recumbent trike, to tell me 'I can't be seen, down there!'
In which case who was he speaking to and why do cars pull onto the other side of the white line when they pass me?

 

[matticus]

Two words: Presta valve. (Most tubes I have are Schraders)

I may have dreamt this, but here goes:

a year or two ago, a guy posted on social media to get help pumping up his road-bike tyre. Years of experience with MTBs, so presumably all Schraders. It later became clear that he'd pumped up a lot of motorbike tyres, too (and vans.) Folks had to explain the whole "undo it a few turns, then a quick push to release it - yup, a bit of air will come out - then lock your pump on, make sure it's straight ... "

Everyone was very patient - it was Guy Martin.

 

[Mugshot]

"Yeah, that's the one, that fits you perfectly."

This while I was stood on tiptoes, neatly lifted and separated by the top tube.

 

[Drago]

Everyone was very patient - it was Guy Martin.

The same Guy Martin who thinks it is quite normal for men in pubs in Ireland to issue drivers licences in exchange for cash?