You're a burglar, but....

[Andy in Germany]

take all the forks from the kitchen drawer and replace with ones from a totally different set - but leave the knives and spoons from the original set

My goodness there are some evil ideas on this thread. If you're going to do that, why not nick the cutlery from the entire street, jumble it up in a sack and replace it in random handfuls?

 

[newfhouse]

Covered in chocolate

Please, come and do it. The key is under the mat, and I’ll be out until six o’clock.

 

[PeteXXX]

My goodness there are some evil ideas on this thread. If you're going to do that, why not nick the cutlery from the entire street, jumble it up in a sack and replace it in random handfuls?

I was just thinking that under our friendly veneer, we're really quite evil

 

[houblon]

I was just thinking that under our friendly veneer, we're really quite evil

There's some evil genius in this group, for sure.

Here's a thing...someone pointed this out a couple of years ago:

https://www.amazon.com/Wenger-16999-Swiss-Knife-Giant/product-reviews/B001DZTJRQ?pageNumber=1

I tried to join the fun but apparently they don't want my review as I don't spend enough money with them. So, any of you big spenders fancy joining in?

(this should probably be a new thread)

 

[Lilliburlero]

The wife.

 

[randynewmanscat]

The vacuum cleaner, I'm pretty sure I saw it last month, could have been longer, maybe somebody has been in and taken it.

 

[LeetleGreyCells]

Switch off electric hobs at the plug. Don't unplug it, just flick the switch to the OFF position. But leave the oven plug set to ON.

 

[Ming the Merciless]

Replace the tea pot with a chocolate one.

 

[Ming the Merciless]

Replace their road bike wheels with kids 24” ones.

 

[LeetleGreyCells]

Remove one piece from every jigsaw puzzle.

 

[Archie_tect]

Remove one piece from every jigsaw puzzle.

Someone's already done that to us.

 

[LeetleGreyCells]

Someone's already done that to us.

Apologies. I was inspired by my wife doing her jigsaw.

I haven't removed a piece, honest!

 

[Archie_tect]

Better to steal two from each one then return one piece with a ransom note for the final piece...

This must be how Agatha Christie got into planning her devious plots... [not with jig-saws mind.]

 

[postman]

Keys out of the window locks

 

[Cycling_Samurai]

The wife.

That might be a pleasant thing for both.