Any good jokes ... ?

[LCpl Boiled Egg]

I accidentally swallowed some food colouring this morning.

The doctor says I'll be OK, but I feel like I dyed a little inside.

 

[Cavalol]

As a child, my little brother fell into a snow globe. He wasn't seriously hurt, but a bit shaken up.

 

[roadrash]

 

[Cavalol]

Once, when I was driving for Mr Kipling, another driver pulled out on me. Luckily my van had exceedingly good brakes.

 

[mistyoptic]

 

[morrisman]

Not been out for a while what with the pandemic and all so thought I'd pop into town tomorrow. Does anyone know what time Woolworths opens.

 

[Chromatic]

Not been out for a while what with the pandemic and all so thought I'd pop into town tomorrow. Does anyone know what time Woolworths opens.

The same time as Timothy Whites.

 

[Dayvo]

Not a joke, but if some of these don’t make you laugh, nothing will.

 

[kynikos]

 

[Joey Shabadoo]

What did the drummer name his three daughters?

Anna 1
Anna 2
Anna 1234

 

[Salty seadog]

I remember when my sister went out with Rod Stewart and then Ronnie Wood. Our dad told her to stop pulling faces.

Brilliant.

 

[Salty seadog]

As a child, my little brother fell into a snow globe. He wasn't seriously hurt, but a bit shaken up.

For your own sake, delete this one.

 

[PaulSB]

 

[Cavalol]

Police are looking for a man who is refusing to update his pdf reader. He is described as mid-thirties, single and has no fixed adobe.

 

[GetFatty]

Nicked from elsewhere