Any good jokes ... ?

[Dave7]

Q. What's the difference between a hippo and a zippo?
A. One is heavy and the other is a little lighter.

 

[Dave7]

I got out of the shower and my wife said "look at the size of your belly, when was the last time you saw your pecker"?
I admitted its been a long time.
She said "you need to diet".
I said " why, what colour is it now"?.

 

[Dave7]

I got a really odd text message yesterday from someone i dont know.
It was some guy asking did i want to meet him in the woods and compare our d*ck sizes.
The weirdo didnt even turn up.

 

[ebikeerwidnes]

I got a really odd text message yesterday from someone i dont know.
It was some guy asking did i want to meet him in the woods and compare our d*ck sizes.
The weirdo didnt even turn up.

Mallard or Coot???

 

[Dave7]

Mallard or Coot???

I'll give you a clue, its not duck.

 

[markemark]

I'll give you a clue, its not duck.

 

[markemark]

?

 

[markemark]

?

 

[AndyRM]

 

[Dave7]

A wise old Chinese man once said to me "my son, when you understand why pizza is made round, put into a square box then cut into triangles ......only then will you understand women"

 

[tyred]