Any good jokes ... ?

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Smokin Joe

Legendary Member
“The bowler’s Holding, the Batsman’s Willey..”
"And Fred Davis, unable to get his leg over at his age, uses his left hand instead"

Ted Lowe
 

PaulB

Legendary Member
Location
Colne
A rare venture from me into the slightly longer joke territory here.....


A prostitute opens up a new venture in...let's just say somewhere in Yorkshire and is aware of their legendary meanness. To start off on the right foot, she advertises her services and informs the locals that their tastes will be catered for and if they keep their request under three words, she'll do it for a fiver.

First guy goes in and asks her to 'shag me stupid' and this she does. £5 changes hands and both parties are happy.

Second guy goes in and he's a bit kinkier so he says, 'beat me up', this she does, the fiver changes hands and both are happy.

The third guy goes in and he's a bit cannier than the other two so he says, 'paint my house.'
 

Cavalol

Guru
Location
Chester
Doctor doctor, I think I'm a small red furry creature that rummages in bins, and am experiencing some pain. Could you prescribe me some medication, please?

For fox ache?

Now now, there's no need to be rude...
 

Cavalol

Guru
Location
Chester
An Englishman, a Frenchman, a Spaniard and a German are all standing watching an American street performer do some juggling.
The juggler notices the four gentlemen have a very poor view, so he stands up on a wooden crate and calls out, "Can you all see me now?"

"Yes"
"Oui"
"Sí"
"Ja"
 

Dave7

Legendary Member
Location
Cheshire
An Englishman, a Frenchman, a Spaniard and a German are all standing watching an American street performer do some juggling.
The juggler notices the four gentlemen have a very poor view, so he stands up on a wooden crate and calls out, "Can you all see me now?"

"Yes"
"Oui"
"Sí"
"Ja"
That is another one that is so bad I have borrowed it and sent it to my Bro.
 
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