How about this?Dear Sir,
I am a concert pianist. I number the Hammerklavier, Islamey, Gaspard de la Nuit, many others too, in my repertoire. It so happens my concert grand is urgently in need of re-stringing. Alas! all the piano wire in the country, so both Herr Steinway and Herr Bosendorfer affirm to me, has been snapped up by a group of utter musical illiterates, buffoons, people who cannot even tell their Ravel from their Ravioli, it appears they come into the shop muttering words like "Lykra" and "Lukozade" under their breath, and buy the entire stock! Now how am I going to get my pianoforte repaired so that I can practice? If this goes on I shall play a wrong note in my next performance Rachmaninov 3! Please help me!
Apalling Times article
- Thread starter Amanda P
- Start date
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snorri
Legendary Member
- Location
- East coast, up a bit.
Pete said:
Juvenile
goo_mason
Champion barbed-wire hurdler
- Location
- Leith, Edinburgh
Pete said:
Genius !!
snorri
Legendary Member
- Location
- East coast, up a bit.
Pete said:
OK
simon l& and a half
New Member
- Location
- Streatham Hill
With respect (and affection) to all of those contributing to this thread, and recognising the talent that's gone into some of the responses, I wouldn't like us to lose sight of the seriousness of this. I don't begrudge Parris his silly fantasy in which cyclists pop cans of Gatorade and throw them into hedgerows, nor do I mind much if he spreads it around. The real issue is that he advocates decapitating us, and that it's not beyond the bounds of possibility for his advocacy to reap results. Decapitation, lest we forget, is fatal.
Cycling Naturalist
Guru
- Location
- Llangollen
Countryside Code
Rule 11
When engaged in decapitating cyclists with piano wire, please make sure that you dispose of the body and head in a tidy manner.
Rule 11
When engaged in decapitating cyclists with piano wire, please make sure that you dispose of the body and head in a tidy manner.
... not necessarily in that order...Patrick Stevens said:
Valid point, Simon, but I think we need to display a bit of flippancy at times even when discussing this and similar grave topics. It's a sort of steam-valve, helping to ease people's blood-pressure. I don't see it as callousness.
Going back to the seriousness of this whole concept - yes, I now recollect a story of my mother's experience many years ago (in the 1950s). She then used to walk to work, partly along a lonely country footpath, often after dark (women walking unaccompanied were much less fearful in those days than they are now). Anyway, one evening just at dusk, she encountered a wire set at ankle height: she saw it in time. When she got home she called out the police. I can't remember the outcome, I was only a kid after all. I hope it was taken seriously. Also I hope it wasn't kids I knew and used to go out and play with.
Twenty Inch
Guru
- Location
- Behind a desk
What can we make of the fact the the Times itself reported a similar wire incident? I'm going to email Harding again and quote his own newspaper at him and ask for a response. I suggest everyone else does the same.
Yes, here is the article (Cyclist left scarred for life by wire trap) should you wish to quote it.
Saddle bum
Über Member
- Location
- Kent
Sent it to Harding with a short pithy message.
Ah, the Times are WONDERFUL! I just got this response to my email to Harding!
Your message
To: Harding, James
Subject: Parris article / Cyclist left scarred for life!
Sent: Wed, 2 Jan 2008 10:34:27 -0000
was deleted without being read on Wed, 2 Jan 2008 11:33:07 -0000
They really like to add insult to injury!
I suggest you ask for a read receipt if you email them (as I did) so at least you will know if it is read!
Your message
To: Harding, James
Subject: Parris article / Cyclist left scarred for life!
Sent: Wed, 2 Jan 2008 10:34:27 -0000
was deleted without being read on Wed, 2 Jan 2008 11:33:07 -0000
They really like to add insult to injury!
I suggest you ask for a read receipt if you email them (as I did) so at least you will know if it is read!
Bad luck, Alfa, sorry to hear that - Not had anything from The Times myself ... yet (just checked).alfablue said:
I wonder if it may be a mistake to set 'Read Receipt'? This often has the opposite effect to what is intended: it gives the recipient the chance to back off (when he gets the 'do you want to send the Read Receipt' prompt) and so he has a chance to delete the message without reading it. In fact it may put off such people as Harding or whoever opens E-mails on his behalf.
Anyway, I sent without the 'Read Receipt' option - something I very rarely use in any case. I advise others to do likewise.
