Meaningless marketing jargon

[postman]

Fairy Liquid removes fat and grease.Not in my shower ,i have been showering in it for a year as i was told it gets rid of fat.I'm still overweight.

 

[Globalti]

In other news, Pepsi-Cola and Coca-Cola have announced that they are giving up the fight and merging.

The first slogan will be: "Be sociable - have a Poke!"

 

[Drago]

You're so money supermarket.

No. No matter how much they keep ramming it down our throats it will not enter into the Engljsh lexicon in the same manner as "simples", so give it up.

 

[Threevok]

"Don't choose just any electric toothbrush. Get one inspired by dentists"

Oh so THAT'S why all my teeth are falling out. I was using one inspired by bricklayers

 

[screenman]

Two for the price of three, my new marketing ploy.

 

[classic33]

Two for the price of three, my new marketing ploy.

You've been beaten to it.
https://singletrackworld.com/2019/0...o-shocks-for-the-price-of-three-but-worth-it/

 

[Brains]

Fairy Liquid removes fat and grease.Not in my shower ,i have been showering in it for a year as i was told it gets rid of fat.I'm still overweight.

You may still be fat, but are you still Greek ?

 

[glasgowcyclist]

Label on a bag of spinach I bought yesterday:
"Honestly grown produce"

Totally meaningless.

 

[perplexed]

'These fully automatic, remotely controlled blinds are powered by a rechargable power pack...'

That'll be a battery then.

 

[Andy in Germany]

Advert in local paper:

"Stuttgart Airport uses 100% ecological battery powered airport tractors, as part of our commitment to carbon neutrality"

You don't need me to explain why this is meaningless, do you?

 

[NorthernDave]

Vauxhall - a British brand since 1903.

Except it's owned by Peugeot, making it French.
And before that it had been a subsidiary of General Motors since 1925, latterly selling rebadged Opels.

 

[gbb]

Dyson...'I completely and utterly believe this Hoover is the future' (or something very similar)

Yeah, well you would say that wouldn't you.

 

[Threevok]

"I train my hair like I train my body"

I'm not sure if "Lipids" are an important part of a sucessful fitness regime

 

[Hover Fly]

Northern Railway: To help make the North a better place to live and work we are committed to: Delivering better journeys(1), with new trains(2) and improved stations(3). Improving customer service, with more people to help you on your journey(4). Keeping our customers safe and secure - day and night.

To clarify:
(1)
(2) - new trains sat in sidings as they don't actually work so you're stuck with the Pacers for at least the rest of this year, despite a promise they'd be gone by the end of 2018

They were originally supposed to be gone by 2000.

 

[Drago]

Screwfix Direct.

The name led me to believe they were a dating agency. Their ads could be clearer on the matter.