Toilet paper

Discussion in 'CycleChat Cafe' started by magnatom, 25 Apr 2010.

  1. mangaman

    mangaman Guest

    Is this 57 just for ass wiping purposes?

    If so it's astounding. The average person has 1-2 bowel movement per day.

    The average Ameriacn therefore uses about 38 sheets of toilet paper per crap. The queue for an American toilet must be never ending.

    (Mind you I'm not a great fan of the Army method either :evil:)

    4 or 5 carefully used sheets I find does me for the day, in case you're interested. :biggrin:
  2. wafflycat

    wafflycat New Member

    middle of Norfolk
    Pah, loo paper is for wimps. Colonic irrigation is the way to go!
  3. on the road

    on the road Über Member

    I'm not surprised considering all the shite they eat :biggrin:
  4. swee'pea99

    swee'pea99 Legendary Member

    It is astonishing, especially when you think of the key word 'average'. Some must be using sensible amounts, so some must be really going for it to keep the numbers up.

    At least part of the explanation may lie in what I was once told when working on a job for a bog paper manufacturer. I queried why women, it appeared, used not just more (which you'd expect, let's not dwell on that) but a lot more. And what was this item in the usage column: 'hovering and nesting'. Turned out a lot of women using loos while out of the home either 'hover' for fear of touching the seat, or 'nest' - ie, use loads of paper to line the seat before they park.
  5. Mad Doug Biker

    Mad Doug Biker Bikeoholics Anonymous

    Craggy Island
    I think you find that nettle leaves are FAR superior!!

    Try it and you'll see what I mean!

    Seriously though, I learned as a kid that if I ran out of bog roll, then the cardboard bit in the middle, if torn up correctly, could substitute instead. It was a bit rougher and much more difficult to use, but hey, it did the job!

    I left one or two people waiting to use the loo after me scratching their heads after I came out, particularly if I had used all of the cardboard! :laugh:
  6. ASC1951

    ASC1951 Guru

    Three, according to my REME mate - "one to scrape, one to wipe, one to polish".
  7. tyred

    tyred Legendary Member

    Toilet paper is the best use I can think of for the Daily Mail.
  8. GrahamG

    GrahamG Veteran

    Maybe they all use really cheap paper - you know, the two ply stuff that you have to fold three times before you get enough to resist a digital penetration.
    Cheap TP is a false economy.
  9. Globalti

    Globalti Legendary Member

    When I lived in Spain as a student they used to hang bits of the newspaper on a string. If they spotted an obituary notice on the sheet they would carefully tear out the crucifix at the top, touch it to the lips and pop it into the shirt pocket then wipe trying to avoid the hole they had made.

    Later I lived in a hall of residence at a college near Seville. All toilet paper had to be thrown in a waste paper basket because the septic tank couldn't manage paper. Every morning the cleaner used to tip all the bins out onto the bog floor then sweep the whole stinking pile out of the door and along the corridor to the patio, where it was stuffed into plastic bags. Then she would slop a bucket of water with bleach on the floor and drive it all down the corridor and out the door with a rubber blade on a stick. I never knew what I hated the most, the smell of the paper or the smell of the bleach.
  10. DP

    DP Chasse patate

    Apparently, Spain gets through more bleach per head than any other country on the planet.

  11. Globalti

    Globalti Legendary Member

    Ah! Perhaps not now - the clever bods at Unilever and Bayer have invented products like Fabuloso and SOS, which take advantage of the Hispanic culture of morning slopping out with a bucket of bleach. Fabuloso was launched in Venezuela and was a marketing success story to rival that of Red Bull.
  12. swee'pea99

    swee'pea99 Legendary Member

    I'm not surprised! What a fabuloso name for a product!
  13. twentysix by twentyfive

    twentysix by twentyfive Clinging on tightly

    Over the Hill
    I once used 20+ pieces of bog paper :blush:. But things were a bit fluid at the time. :ohmy:
  14. Hover Fly

    Hover Fly Lover of the bunny

  15. biggs682

    biggs682 Smile a mile bike provider

    always taught i sheet at max for number 1's and 2 for number 2's
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