Toilet roll ettiquette

[longers]

There's a very interesting book about Hampshire Privies which was in my In-Laws loo.

Among the stories of the Night Soil collections and all the wonderful outdoor loo's of the county, the author tells the tale of being in Denmark and being offered the use of her shell by an elderly lady at the communal loo there .

 

[Alan Frame]

Toilet roll etiquette ?

Always place used sheets in the bowl rather than back on the roll.

 

[Fnaar]

In days of old
When knights were bold
Before paper was ever invented
They wiped their @rse
On blades of grass
And walked away contented.


In Greece, you put the used bogroll in a wastepaper bin by the loo. I could NOT live like that, as my "habits-de-toilette" would be somewhat incongruous with the custom.

 

[red_tom]

A famous actress/environmentalist advised that only 3 sheets were needed. I think it was on the old C+ site. The communal wisdon was that it depended on how hairy your bum was!

That was Sheryl Crow.

One the hairy part, I remember reading about one particulally hirsute gentleman describing 'the act' as like trying to get peanut butter out of shag pile carpet.

I got to use a super japanese electronic toilet the other day - no paper at all. Very very impressed with it.

 

[snorri]

this thread is *****

 

[Trembler49]

The world is divided into those who fold and those who scrunch.

Obviously scrunching is a perversion and should be avoided.

 

[Arch]

Well, like I said, I have the free end at the front and I've never experienced a complete unwinding situation. Perhaps because I'm one of those people who can do something without always using maximum force.

And I'm folder, not a scruncher. And I'm fairly abstemious.

 

[trustysteed]

assuming a reasonable quality toilet paper, tear off 2 sheets, fold and wipe. repeat until required shine is reached. makes for a very efficient use of the available roll.

i hang the paper from the back so that instead of having to twist around with one hand to hold the roll while i tear with the left, i can just lean sideways against the roll with my shoulder while breaking off the sheets!

 

[Pete]

Excuse me* if I'm missing something, but how do you know if

the required shine is reached?

Are we talking about a shine on a certain part of the anatomy normally difficult to place under scrutiny, or are we (as is normal custom with bidets out some place 'forrun') using the contrivance for the purpose of 'washing the feet'? I think we should be told.

*no not that reason to 'excuse me'

 

[gavintc]

I think free range toilet rolls are superior to the cheap low quality ones you get these days in supermarkets. Toilet rolls have feelings to.

 

[Globalti]

If no stream of water is available a handful of wet moss or a large leaf makes a pleasant substitute.

 

[bobg]

I recall a sign in the toilet of the "cottage homes" for poor little orphan kids in Hornchurch
"one up, one down, one polish" !!!

 

[Fnaar]

I recall a sign in the toilet of the "cottage homes" for poor little orphan kids in Hornchurch
"one up, one down, one polish" !!!

Did they have Polish kids, then?

 

[SamNichols]

Who was it who recently told us that we should only use 1 sheet when wiping our bottoms? Was it Heather Mills?

 

[Fnaar]

Who was it who recently told us that we should only use 1 sheet when wiping our bottoms? Was it Heather Mills?

Post #19 from Red Tom tells us it was Sheryl Crow. But I think it was Ophelia Stinkfinger.