True Facts About Ross Kemp
- Thread starter Drago
- Start date
Page may contain affiliate links. Please see terms for details.
accountantpete
OAP
Ross Kemp starred in Dr Who You Looking At
DRM
Guru
- Location
- West Yorks
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/videos/c80dx2z8jldo
Spanish and Portugese Police & Fire Investigation teams are desperately searching for stockily built, bald Englishman, wearing a T-Shirt, Jeans & leather jacket, in connection with wildfires that have broken out in the two countries, they believe that a combination of strong sunlight, being reflected and refracted into a concentrated beam from his highly polished bald head, and reflecting back from amazingly strong retinas, caused tinder dry grass to ignite, they believe it is no coincidence that English Ex-Pats said that they "had seen that bloke off East Enders way back in the day, in the area" Police are trawling reruns on BBC iPlayer in search of a possible match
Spanish and Portugese Police & Fire Investigation teams are desperately searching for stockily built, bald Englishman, wearing a T-Shirt, Jeans & leather jacket, in connection with wildfires that have broken out in the two countries, they believe that a combination of strong sunlight, being reflected and refracted into a concentrated beam from his highly polished bald head, and reflecting back from amazingly strong retinas, caused tinder dry grass to ignite, they believe it is no coincidence that English Ex-Pats said that they "had seen that bloke off East Enders way back in the day, in the area" Police are trawling reruns on BBC iPlayer in search of a possible match
OP
OP
Drago
Legendary Member
- Location
- Suburban Poshshire
Ross Kemp's term presenting Police 5 ended prematurely after asking the cameraman live on air, "what you looking at?" and chinning him.
Benedidt Cumberbatch has been drafted in as an emergency replacement and his first appeal was for the identity of a well built chap in a leather jacket who'd chinned a cameraman in the ITV London studio thenprevious week.
Benedidt Cumberbatch has been drafted in as an emergency replacement and his first appeal was for the identity of a well built chap in a leather jacket who'd chinned a cameraman in the ITV London studio thenprevious week.
Mad Doug Biker
Banned from every bar in the Galaxy
- Location
- Craggy Island
In the Final at the Olympics, all Ross had to do was play a take - out shot to win Curling Gold.
This he did in style, except that he played the shot so hard that all of the stones shattered in the process!
This he did in style, except that he played the shot so hard that all of the stones shattered in the process!
OP
OP
Drago
Legendary Member
- Location
- Suburban Poshshire
In Strongman competitions the Atlas stones are to be renamed the Kemp stones in honour of Ross Kemp's weighty and granite like testicles.
Don't ask what the caber is to be renamed as until after the 9pm watershed.
Don't ask what the caber is to be renamed as until after the 9pm watershed.
accountantpete
OAP
Ross Kemp will be playing the part of Eddie Hall in the film biography of the Stoke On Trent strongman and has been taking special muscle slimming injections in order to get into shape.
OP
OP
Drago
Legendary Member
- Location
- Suburban Poshshire
Ross Kemp has special dispensation from the King to mix his recycling with his general waste.
OP
OP
Drago
Legendary Member
- Location
- Suburban Poshshire
Ross Kemp's leather jacket is the only man-made object other than the Great Wall of China that can be seen from space. Indeed, ISS astronauts use it as a navigation marker.
OP
OP
Drago
Legendary Member
- Location
- Suburban Poshshire
When Ross Kemp gives someone the finger hes telling them how long in seconds before theyre aboit to get knocked out.
OP
OP
Drago
Legendary Member
- Location
- Suburban Poshshire
The Swiss Army use Ross Kemp knives.
accountantpete
OAP
The taxi driver arrested for carrying an offensive weapon pleaded innocent, saying he didn't know Ross Kemp was the passenger.
