Any good jokes ... ?

[Jameshow]

Anyone who says thier wedding day was the best day of thier life has never had 2 KitKats drop out of the vending machine.

Or a completely chocolate one!!

 

[tyred]

 

[FishFright]

When I was little my mum used to bath me in cheap Australian lager, it wasn't until much later in life that i realised I'd be fostered.

 

[ebikeerwidnes]

Well I'm back

Had to go to r=Runcorn t hel someone with their computer

got home and shortly after we got a phone call to say that the Grand Kids other grand Dad had been taken to hospital

basicllay he w=felt il at work - pain and tightness in his chest and pain - a lot of pain
so he went home and went to bed!!
next morning he couldn't feel his leg and his son called an ambulance

at one point they were about to take his legs off - but his heart was not strong enough to take it

they opted for drugs but with little hope
but about midnight they decided he might stand a local anaesthetic and used that to try to break up the clots

and he survived


he now seems to e far far better

which is good

but that meant we were looking after the kids all afternoon and evening
the oldest (13 female - so grumpy) was more grumpy than usual
the middle one - who is autistic - wanted hugs and kisses far far more tham usual so he was clearly worried but didn't know why
he was also accepting his parents being away from home without warning
he seems behind and autisitic in many ways but we have to remember he is pretty smart in some ways and picks up on things!



anyway

main things - to you all - don't "go for a lie down" with symptoms like that!!

and also - my wife ca be a pain at time - but I know that if I started feeling like that she would do whatever it took to get me to hospital
even I didn't want to!!!





anyway - we also have a funeral today - different part of the family

so it

 

[craigwend]

 

[Dave7]

Boss Arrives In His New Car.......

So there he is in his shiny new BMW.
One of his underlings says "Nice car Boss".
The Boss says "Thank you. Now, if you work extremely hard, maybe put more hours in and sell more of our products.....
..........then by this time next year I can have an even better one"

 

[Cavalol]

Asked my eldest son what he learned at school today.

"The teacher told me that gay men like ynoS, lesbians like ahamaY and transgender people like esoB."

I knelt down, put my hand on his shoulder and said "Son... those are all just backwards stereotypes."

 

[richardfm]

Well I'm back

Had to go to r=Runcorn t hel someone with their computer

got home and shortly after we got a phone call to say that the Grand Kids other grand Dad had been taken to hospital

basicllay he w=felt il at work - pain and tightness in his chest and pain - a lot of pain
so he went home and went to bed!!
next morning he couldn't feel his leg and his son called an ambulance

at one point they were about to take his legs off - but his heart was not strong enough to take it

they opted for drugs but with little hope
but about midnight they decided he might stand a local anaesthetic and used that to try to break up the clots

and he survived


he now seems to e far far better

which is good

but that meant we were looking after the kids all afternoon and evening
the oldest (13 female - so grumpy) was more grumpy than usual
the middle one - who is autistic - wanted hugs and kisses far far more tham usual so he was clearly worried but didn't know why
he was also accepting his parents being away from home without warning
he seems behind and autisitic in many ways but we have to remember he is pretty smart in some ways and picks up on things!



anyway

main things - to you all - don't "go for a lie down" with symptoms like that!!

and also - my wife ca be a pain at time - but I know that if I started feeling like that she would do whatever it took to get me to hospital
even I didn't want to!!!





anyway - we also have a funeral today - different part of the family

so it

Is this in the right thread or has the joke gone over my head?

 

[ebikeerwidnes]

Is this in the right thread or has the joke gone over my head?

Whoops
my laptop had broken and I was using my phone
which I am not used to using for that!!

 

[Dave7]

Is this in the right thread or has the joke gone over my head?

Wrong thread.
But he's a nice guy really so he can be forgiven

 

[tyred]

 

[postman]

Wrong thread.
But he's a nice guy really so he can be forgiven

i thought he was on something and tripping maaaan.