Ashamed to say I drive a BMW

[Drago]

My motorbike does it in 3 seconds (full house V Max) and the only attitude it creates in me is one of brown adrenaline due to brakes hewn from Dairylea and forks assembled from the finest knitting needles. Some people are too terrified to adopt the superior attitude.

 

[SpokeyDokey]

[QUOTE 3717833, member: 45"]I once hired a £40k land-rover. It does try to push an air of invincibility and power onto you.

My motorbike does 0-60 in less than 4 seconds and I have no idea how fast it will top out. It does try to push an attitude of being the fastest and better than in you.[/QUOTE]

I thought cars were non-sentient - maybe I am wrong.

So what are we saying here - I nip out to the kitchen and pick up teensy bread buttering knife and I'll happily start buttering bread. But...if I pick up the big chicken cleaver thing (not sure how we came to buy it tbh) and all of a sudden it will start 'pushing' psychopathic slashing tendencies into my susceptible bonce?

 

[SamR]

I personally feel that Audi, BMW etc. are objects of quality, like a nice carbon bike or an Apple product and It's the people who buy them and then drive them badly who give them a bad name. If I could buy an Audi or BMW, I would, but I'd also try my best to avoid those stereotypes if I did. Those people buy them as status symbols, whereas others prefer to buy them as functional objects of quality.

 

[Drago]

But...if I pick up the big chicken cleaver thing (not sure how we came to buy it tbh) and all of a sudden it will start 'pushing' psychopathic slashing tendencies into my susceptible bonce?

Only in the psychologically weak and inadequate.

If Audi manufacture objects of quality then why as a manufacturer are they doing so poorly in the JD Power rankings?

http://www.whatcar.com/awards/jdpower/2014/make/audi

BMW aren't delivering a premium experience either...

http://www.whatcar.com/awards/jdpower/2014/make/bmw

MB do a little better as an average, which is strange as of the 3 it's usually their drivers that Try hardest to kill me...

http://www.whatcar.com/awards/jdpower/2014/make/mercedes-benz

So it's interesting what Sam perceives to be 'quality'. Surely he hasn't fallen for the glossy marketing and lower middle class wannabe image?

 

[slowmotion]

Never mind the stereotypes. I drive a white van. Bring on the prejudice.
I was thinking of getting some "Cyclists, Stay Back" stickers.

 

[SpokeyDokey]

Only in the psychologically weak and inadequate.

That's a relief then.

The chicken cleaver thing has never influenced me on the 2 or 3 occasions I have used it.

Ergo: I am psychologically strong and adequate. Not sure what I am adequate at though - resisting the mind influencing auras of knives, cars and other assorted inanimate objects?

 

[mrbikerboy73]

I drive a BMW and feel no shame. But I must admit, I do feel a bit embarrassed when I see some wet behind the ears boy racer driving one like a total knob end.

 

[anothersam]

I drive a Toyota subcompact. It's sentient enough to get jealous of the Land Rovers around here.

 

[Bazzer]

I think the reality is any driver can be a knob.
My last worryingly close pass was a towed caravan. The question I have subsequently found myself pondering, is whether my general prejudice against caravan drivers whilst driving, has altered my perception of the incident?
Then I think probably, but bollox to this deep thought stuff and have a .

 

[Drago]

I drive a BMW and feel no shame. But I must admit, I do feel a bit embarrassed when I see some wet behind the ears boy racer driving one like a total knob end.

A real Bimmer, or a wannabe 4 series or lower? Genuine Ms excepted.

 

[jonny jeez]

By 'driver's I taken it you mean 'be seated behind the steering wheel while the BMW is in motion'?

Nah, you're thinking of apple and google drivers, those guys just have no sense of humour, its all so robotic.

 

[jonny jeez]

[QUOTE 3717718, member: 259"]I mourn the passing of my wife's BMW company car almost every day. Rear-wheel drive, 3 litres, bam![/QUOTE]
I once did the "bam" thing in my new 325 coupe ( a good 10 years ago) as I joined the A21 from a garage and hit spilt diesel...found myself facing the wrong way into two lanes of traffic. Managed to spin it 360 and carried on trying to pretend to myself that nothing had happened.

Chap pulled along side and gave me the open Knuckle wave like I had done it on purpose .

To this day I don't know how I managed to come out of that without hitting something
Rear wheel drives have their drawbacks.

 

[mrbikerboy73]

A real Bimmer, or a wannabe 4 series or lower? Genuine Ms excepted.

Me or the wet behind the ears boy racer? I drive a real one with a proper 6 pot engine, none of that turbo rubbish.

 

[jonny jeez]

Oh and I have also owned a range rover, two audis, three bmws, and for a very short while a 911.

Right now I don't own a car (sold my Renault at the weekend)

Haters gonna hate.

 

[Drago]

Me or the wet behind the ears boy racer? I drive a real one with a proper 6 pot engine, none of that turbo rubbish.

So a 3 series then.

I've had a 928GT, Honda NSX, Boxster S, 2 x Integrala Evos which were ferociously quick, a 348.

Its not a case of haters gotta hate - a case of I just don't care any more. The drive way willy waving at the neighbours is pointlessly expensive, and once away from the influence of the Ex my brain soon recalibrated itself. One house owned outright, the second house being covered by the rent on the first, and I get to work, the shops, relatives houses as quickly as I ever did in the exotica, even in the floods or snow.

You can't eat cars, you can't sleep in them (well, in an emergency you can) and the slowest car I ever owned could exceed the national limit by 50%. I shudder to think of all the money I, admittedly financed by the ex, spunked needlessly on fast or flash cars. My current truck has kept me mobile now for 2 years for less than the price of a single months repayment on the Boxster. I just no longer feel the need to drive around with my wallet on display. Just as well, cos there ain't a lot in it!

One amusing moment. When I got the 750iL it was a huge, quietly impressive machine. My first drive to work in it I parked it next to the inspectors Lexus, which looked pretty puny in comparison. A few days later I was dragged off by professional standards who shone an anglepoise lamp in my face and demanded to know how I could afford a to grand motor on a then PCs wages, and wanted me to sign all sorts of bits of paper giving them authority to check my financial affairs. With a wealth spouse from a wealthy family and a seriously good income I was emboldened by not needing to work at all if I didn't want to, so so told them to f*** off (quite literally used those words) and come back when they had some proof of done something wrong - its for them to prove me guilty, not me to prove I'm innocent. After a few days hand wringing from the inspector, who was doubtlessly being leaned on by Profession Standards, I still refused to sign any authority to search my bank accounts. After all, if they had evidence of wrongdoing they could get a RIPA. A short while later it all went quiet and I heard nothing more.