Best tried just the once

[Joey Shabadoo]

Signed up for the MOKbike challenge. Checked with the organiser who said my Tricross would handle the mountain bike course as it was "mainly forest trails". Drove overnight to Campbelltown and slept through dawn in the car. Proudly lined my £600 Tricross up alongside £4000 full suspension Orange bikes at the start. One guy told his mate - "He's brave doing the course on that - must be fit". I never saw him or his mate again after the start.

Half an hour in it was clear there was no way I would complete the course so I took a "shortcut" back to the start, through a muddy field where I sank up to my knees. Made it to the start in time to do a 60-odd mile Sportive. Scraped off the mud, pumped up the tyres, jumped on the saddle and overheard one girl telling her partner "Coo, he's just finished the mountain bike course and now he's doing this - that's hardcore."

I never saw her or her partner again after the start. In part because I finished last and in part because I got lost and did 20 extra miles (all uphill).

I got one of the last Macmillan t-shirts at the finish - an XS. Not much good for a 17st fat guy. The pub had run out of cask ale and I got the last scrapings of what might have been a chicken curry with some oatcakes because there was no rice.

I learned two things - a Tricross is not a mountain bike and a Tricross is not a Sportive bike. Also, a 17st fat guy is unlikely to be good at either.

 

[Trickedem]

London Edinburgh London.
I swore never again at the time...roll on 2017

 

[clid61]

aged 20 jumping into a swimming pool in tenerife in the dead of night pissed up and fully clothed , thought i was going to drown dragged out by security

 

[byegad]

Borrowing an acquaintance's upright trike for a ride around the car park, and bringing it back to him with scuffed handlebar tape and rear wheel hub, having fallen over twice. I now ride recumbent trikes with ease, and did right from the first ride, but an upright trike is very different.

I never see him these days.

 

[GGJ]

Freewheeling out of the saddle as you go over a rough section of road on your fixed gear bike...You'll only do it once and never forget again

 

[Globalti]

Lying under my Landy with an angle grinder, trying to cut a rusted bolt off the chassis. Manouvered the grinder up under the floor, blade downwards, not realising that my latex-gloved finger was on the trigger. You guessed it - the grinder powered up, going from zero to about 15,000 rpm in a second. I managed to release the trigger and lay there juggling the beast as it powered down, trying desperately to prevent it from dropping onto my chest. Desperation turned to pain as the decelerating blade dropped into the palm of my hand and luckily the glove snagged it and stopped it, ripping open and allowing me to suffer a nice narrow burn mark across my palm. I think I got off lightly.

 

[wheresthetorch]

Disconnecting the positive lead first from the battery of an old Ural motorcycle with a fuel leak. My spanner touched the (earthed) frame of the bike while attached to the positive terminal. Cue massive shower of sparks - I was very lucky the whole thing didn't go up. Spanner still has a nice weld mark on it as a reminder!

 

[GGJ]

Gathering speed downhill on a fixed gear only to realise your legs don't turn fast enough...

 

[Joey Shabadoo]

Pulling a wheelie and watching your front wheel roll off into the distance.

Ok, it's been quite a few years since that one.