My Boss is an a-hole

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OP
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Crankarm

Crankarm

Guru
Location
Nr Cambridge
Thanks to everyone for your replies even Vernon who is an insufferable ar5e. Only kidding, not ^_^.

I have been keeping a diary for some time as there have been quite a few incidents some of them very troubling which I don't wish to go into on here as they are of a very serious nature that could result in summary dismissal, things you are just not supposed to do or speak about at work. Sorry to be vague.

As regards union I have also considered this but many unions now make you sign a declaration on joining that they will not act for you with repect to incidents that occur prior to you joining which is a bit of a problem. In a previous job I was a member of the IPMS for 9 years. However when non union colleagues had a problem they joined the union and got full membership services and support which erked me no end as they were useless when I had an issue many many years ago that I needed support with. So on this basis I have not joined another union since. Tbh the union was frankly hopeless IMHO. Ok for accompanying one to a meeting, recording what was being said but beyond that a bit useless IME.

Back to the current situation, as regards colleagues, some are ok, but none are sufficiently experienced or I believe would have the necessary discretion should I approach them in confidence.

My aim is to find another job anyway, which is easier said than done, preferably a salaried job again with half decent money. This job could have been ok as the nature of the work and opportunities looked promising at the outset. But unfortunately I can't say too much about what I do or the industry as I am mindful of disclosing any identifying details which could cause difficulties.

Neither do I really want to go down the route of secretly filming or recording the individuals who are causing me grief as this opens yet another mine field should they discover me doing this. We do periodically have staff searches. We had one last week and the contents of my panniers brought much hilarity to my colleagues and ridicule and humiliation for me which I do not wish to repeat. Plus we are not allowed to have phones on us while we are working. In any case mine is very basic merely making calls.

I think I shall make some preliminary enquiries regarding the company's bullying and harassment policies and also the grievance procedure. However I am aware that once I initiate these my working environment could become extremely difficult, my hours cut drastically in retaliation as it will be obvious who has made the complaint or more seriously for me be out of a job. As it is, next week, I am only scheduled to work 17 hours which is totally ridiculous. I was promised at least 30 hours each week which I have struggled to secure the past few months. Newer staff who have started recently have been scheduled to work 35 - 40 hours. I am in danger of being sidelined for these new staff.

Thanks again for all the replies and advice.
 

locker

Active Member
Location
Bristol
I don't get a good morning, just a grimace and if I am lucky a scowl when he unlocks the door to let me in. This heathen has no manners. Within minutes he has found some totally insignificant thing to shout at me about, whether it is anything to do with me or not, or drag me into his office to threaten me that he will contact HR, cut my hours or replace me. And yet he doesn't cos he knows I am professional and do a good job and it would cost him a lot of time and money to train some one else which he has admitted to me, not complimenting me that I do a good job though. So his campaign of bullying and harassment against me continues. When he is not in work is half ok and when one of his two faced grass assistant managers is not there it borders on enjoyable. I would love to tell my boss where to stick his head where the sun doesn't shine, but until I get another job or win £148 million I am stuck. I try to keep out his way and when he does speak to me rants at me, bite my lip it almost bleeds, keeping what I have to say professional and to the absolute minimum. I was an enthusiastic motivated employee when I joined who achieved a lot quickly, but his management and that of his underlings have changed this so I can't wait to leave.

How do you get through the day if your boss is an a-hole?

You must get some help with this matter as it will only get worse & cause you to be more frustrated & depressed, talking to someone like ACAS is essential & believe me it works as I employ people & have also been bullied in the workplace over the years. Bullying by customers is another thing I have to put up with but as an employee it is easier to deal with your employer than a customer.
Please seek help as people can change & your boss may have problems of his own & doesn`t realise that he is causing so much stress, it`s not a question of him feeling sorry for you but of being made to understand his own problems as he clearly has some.
By doing something you may not just be helping yourself but helping him be a better person, acas.org.uk contact them they will help there is no one better than them.
Good luck.
 

asterix

Comrade Member
Location
Limoges or York
I've worked for 2 really nasty bosses. The first one used to pick on staff until they left. No particular reason why the person should be hounded out, it seemed to be almost a game. His tactic was to get the person into his office and reduce them to tears. He'd issue written warning which he made them sign! Eventually my turn came. Although he never reduced me to tears, when I got the dreaded written warning I said I would not accept it and asked if he would escalate the matter to HR. He than said he would retract the warning but I insisted that the matter went to HR and it did. Next time my boss was on holiday they sent another manager to run the office. He interviewed each of us and got our view of what went on as a result of which my boss was sacked! I didn't stay on long as the

The 2nd nasty boss was more professional and gave me work that was difficult or badly specified so he could pick holes in it, especially at appraisal time when we used to have shouting matches over it all! Thankfully I managed to get into a different team eventually and a year or two later my former boss was dying of cancer aged about 50.

My advice would be to leave the job as soon as possible. Going down the HR route is a 2nd best option. Enduring the situation will not do your mental well-being any good and even when you do find something else the scars may make it difficult to perform as well for a while.
 

Raging Squirrel

Well-Known Member
Location
North West
Can I just say, if you left your job without doing anything, this would flag up 2 issues which I personally would feel very strongly about.

Firstly, you've let him win. This is exactly why he is bullying you, and to quit your job basically hands it to him on a silver platter.

Secondly, if you leave without mentioning it to HR........someone else, maybe your new replacement, is gonna get it too, maybe even worse this time.

I think he feels threatened by you. Why should you leave a job that you like doing because this peanut has got a problem with you? I couldn't let it happen if it were me. I'd stand my ground and suck it up. What's the worst that could happen? It's just going to piss him off even more when he see's you arent arsed about anything he does.

As for him letting you feel his wrath by cutting your hours, how could he do that if a grievance has been put in? If this is brought up in the grievance, the fact that he cuts your hours as a kind of punishment, then he's be getting watched on it......and if you get rediculous hours like 17 in a whole week, flag it up to HR again, and if you need to, put in another grievance.

I'm just dying for my boss to make a mistake so I can put a grievance in against her. It's got to the point where she won't even speak to me unless she needs something, which is very very rare. I know it's pissing her off that I'm not arsed, scared or worried about anything she does because she knows for a fact she wouldn't stand a chance once i'd told my girlfriend.

At the end of the day you're there to earn a living, you arent there for fun or do make friends, you don't have to put up with shoot like this, you have rights. I don't care if people in work like me or hate me, if they do like me then cool, if they dont? Their loss as far as i'm aware.
 
OP
OP
Crankarm

Crankarm

Guru
Location
Nr Cambridge
Crankers - stick something in his tea.

Another guy makes his tea/coffee. The thought had crossed my mind ;) .

Yesterday he pretty much ignored me save for one very short conversation when he was telling me how he wanted something to be done. He spoke to me like I was 4 years old. Fortunately he went home at 3pm. Right at the end of the day one of his asst managers made yet more homophobic remarks about wearing Lyrca or S P A N D E X as he takes pleasure in saying. But as days go not too bad. I kept my head down and stayed out of their way.
 
OP
OP
Crankarm

Crankarm

Guru
Location
Nr Cambridge
he has a tea-wallah!

Yep, two actually.
 

PaulB

Legendary Member
Location
Colne
Why don't you just camp the lunt? I used to get all bent out of shape when I had a right peanut manager but time tends to wash everything clean and real peanuts end up the losers. I've seen three former managers come to sticky ends. One ended up in jail, one was fired only three months after I'd walked out on him and the other is still at the same company but demoted by two levels to occupy a menial position with a huge loss of income.

You can get too close to the situation and let it dominate your life. Don't. If your work isn't your passion or your vocation, then it should be regarded as the bottom of your list of priorities. All other things, your family, your cycling, your sports team, your home, your...everything else should take up the valuable time you have on this planet but letting someone like that make you worry has handed him powers unworthy of him. Never let vermin like this win. Smile when he hovers into your sight and see him as a huge pile of shite given magical powers of life by a random bolt of lightning. That always works for me. That and my patented direct confrontational approach not giving a flying Donald Duck about reputations or status.
 

dellzeqq

pre-talced and mighty
Location
SW2
^ that's very sound advice, Crankers (except for the camping bit). I've never had an abusive employer, but I've met and dealt with insufferable clients - including one who said 'you can resign your job if you want, but I'll still find you'. It was my practice to radiate sunshine, whatever the incoming weather. It didn't change their behaviour, but it made me feel so much better, and, perhaps more to the point, it helped those who were similarly abused.
 

screenman

Legendary Member
I would say that if everyone else is doing alright, that new people are getting more hour etc. then you need to look very closely at your self. Like a animal can seek out a nervous person so can a bully. You seem to have had issue's in the past as you say, is history repeating itself, are you in the correct field of employment.

I know I sound hard but I come from the other side of the fence, I have employed lots of people who were not as good as they seemed when interviewed, so not only bosses are wxxxxxs. Mind you only mangers and people who have employed people would know that.
 

Andy_R

Hard of hearing..I said Herd of Herring..oh FFS..
Location
County Durham
Another guy makes his tea/coffee. The thought had crossed my mind ;) .

Yesterday he pretty much ignored me save for one very short conversation when he was telling me how he wanted something to be done. He spoke to me like I was 4 years old. Fortunately he went home at 3pm. Right at the end of the day one of his asst managers made yet more homophobic remarks about wearing Lyrca or S P A N D E X as he takes pleasure in saying. But as days go not too bad. I kept my head down and stayed out of their way.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't that a criminal offence nowadays, or at least a public order offence?
 
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